How to love and be loved | Billy Ward | TEDxFoggyBottom

  • Опубликовано: 3 апр 2014
  • Through a story of one of his students, Billy shows the importance of loving others and of being loved.
    Billy Ward is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) and has been practicing in for the past 13 years in the New York City Suburbs of New Jersey. In addition to having a private practice, he has also been counseling students at Seton Hall Prep High School since 1998. Currently he is the director of retreats for the school and also teaches a senior course for Human Development and Theology. Billy's approach to teaching centers on the development of mind, body and spirit. His personal philosophy is LOVE and Be LOVED.
    Billy is a graduate from Georgetown University where he studied Psychology. He was also the quarterback of the football team for four years. He had a short stint with the Baltimore Ravens in 1999, which was a great experience and personal achievement. He continues to credit his athletic experiences with helping him to understand the mind-body connection and the ability to set a life goal with great determination and tenacity. After leaving Baltimore he continued his study of psychology at Seton Hall University where he attained his Masters Degree and Post Masters Degree.
    Billy is married to his soul mate and best friend Lia. They have two sons, two-year-old JD and 5 month old Casey. The family is completed by their Golden Retriever, Grover Ward.
    In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized.* (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)

Комментарии • 1 441

  • sivaram kumareswaran
    sivaram kumareswaran 13 часов назад

    What if you are an orphan and is hated, can you say that god loves you?

  • Z E R O
    Z E R O День назад +1

    I am my own sun, lighthouse and disco ball.

  • cs2dogs
    cs2dogs 2 дня назад

    This Ted Talk not only had me in tears by the end, but I also found this truly inspirational. Thank you, Billy Ward & Daniel.

  • Pizza Parade
    Pizza Parade 3 дня назад

    Meh, this one sucked.

  • Elio Garcia
    Elio Garcia 3 дня назад


  • Keith Foester
    Keith Foester 4 дня назад +1

    the volume gets lower as the video goes.

  • short potato
    short potato 5 дней назад

    this was great, tho i cant think of anyone to fit in to my lighthouse or sun, my teaher played this today in class and she was really hyped about it. when your teachers in a good mood we're all in a good mood. so thanks it was really inspirational.

  • Moeed Shaikh
    Moeed Shaikh 5 дней назад

    You can't ask who person do you think with all these question while I am watching it know why she is constantly on my mind.

  • lila 123456789
    lila 123456789 6 дней назад

    Pls ignore my comment, its not related to the video
    You will be loved too. As i said, i will look for you when the time is right
    All i wish to you is to just relax as of now. Things will get better for you soon.

  • Hamilton Lover
    Hamilton Lover 6 дней назад

    I’m not crying! You are!!

    LATEESHA SMITH 11 дней назад

    That was beautiful.

  • &a.l.l.thatjazz
    &a.l.l.thatjazz 12 дней назад

    I'm not crying you're crying

  • &a.l.l.thatjazz
    &a.l.l.thatjazz 12 дней назад

    Omfg what a crazy coincidence. I happen to watching this on 2/7 which is the day Daniel died.

  • Mais Faisal
    Mais Faisal 17 дней назад

    this is literally one of the best and most inspiring videos ive ever watched!

  • Gareth Davies
    Gareth Davies 18 дней назад

    i came here for love and got depressed, i couldn't think of anyone for anything, i am truly alone

  • Gayle Santone
    Gayle Santone 20 дней назад

    This is so beautiful. I wish our world would reflect this in every way, wouldn’t we all much happier

  • QuiveringNow
    QuiveringNow 25 дней назад

    We're so lucky that he let us know the secret to our purpose here on earth. Could he be any more arrogant?

  • Hubert Parchomiuk
    Hubert Parchomiuk Месяц назад

    1. When people chose love they choose right
    2. The most important relationship is with ourselves
    3. We are here to love and be loved.
    4. Sun - Iza
    5. Lighthause - trener Hubert, Adam, Michał B?
    6. Disco ball - Michał Ej, Iza
    7. Daniel was to him a disco ball. All people reflected his smile and energy. He was able to be free, to be himself. He did a handmade birthday card for the teacher. He was redefining cool. People loved him.
    8. The toughest guy in the room is the loving guy.
    9. Daniel died early.
    10. Anyone and everyone can be like Daniel even you and me

  • Maria Lugo
    Maria Lugo Месяц назад

    I never write anything but you have made me cry like crazy. Beautiful speech 💖😊

  • _ TheNiftyGal _
    _ TheNiftyGal _ Месяц назад

    I can't relate to this,im the loneliest person in this world

    SN4VИ DJ F!SH BEATS M4Я7!И [SDFBM] Месяц назад +1


  • LauraNatalalia
    LauraNatalalia Месяц назад

    such a heartwarming story! my grandmother was definitely all of the three and i continue missing her every day

  • Lene Jeanette Taralrud
    Lene Jeanette Taralrud Месяц назад

    This video made me think about Jesus ❤️

  • K B
    K B Месяц назад

    I remember in high school that someone said I'd be walked over and hurt if I was happy and that was the first thing I ever started to believe in and it broke me and you saying that made me want to smile and try happy again but this time I'll be back stronger then ever because I played the weak go with the flow person I'm ready to try the stand up for what you believe and smile about it with love

  • Umar Abbasi
    Umar Abbasi Месяц назад

    Man I’m in a really bad place in my life, if I have to watch this entire video well taking notes. I guess this is what rock bottom looks like.

  • soumyadwip biswas
    soumyadwip biswas 2 месяца назад

    So help me
    This girl loves me so much
    So I need to open myself to her love right ?
    But My confusion lies that I don't feel the same thing inside my heart and I don't want to hurt her ever

  • Ja Richardson
    Ja Richardson 2 месяца назад

    I’m so messed up because my mom and dad were always around for $ and discipline. But never received the I love you”s and affirmations people and especially children need ... I now try to stop that cycle and remind my kids often their awesome and love them. it sucks as far as I don’t have nearly any sympathy or empathy for others I wish that can be fixed

  • Ja Richardson
    Ja Richardson 2 месяца назад

    Perfect cadence brother

  • Julia Dodson
    Julia Dodson 2 месяца назад

    Why does he look like animated nightwing?

  • KeaneOTC
    KeaneOTC 2 месяца назад

    This guy is a theology teacher at my school. Amazing teacher!

  • Chris
    Chris 2 месяца назад +1

    Listen, I'm over people who have found love talking about finding love like it's some occurance that is bound to happen... like it's some right. You are not entitled to love. You are not entitled to comfort by the hands of another individual. You are not entitled to that sense of security... you're just lucky if you find all of that and more. We need to stop giving people a false sense of comfort by saying there is someone out there for everyone, when in fact, many people will never meet that someone.
    This is not about loving yourself enough to love someone else and be loved. This is about actual, real life and the decisions human beings make. It may not be your fault you're single. It may not be your fault you're sad, but it is you're fault if that's the way you need to be to protect yourself, and I wish that was talked about more. I wish we talked about how others should be treated more. There would be a lot less broken hearts if everyone decided to be forthright about his or her feelings, and there would be a lot less pain if we learned that your match may truly never be out there. This hypothesis is a blanket statement that's been said for years without viable proof. Don't believe everything everyone tells you.

  • Cringemaster64
    Cringemaster64 2 месяца назад

    I lost my father May 7th. I went into a deep depression and cycles of darkness. As a defense mechanism I shut everything off... I’ve been numb for a while, I’m not quite sure how to “love” anymore or feel loved. I embraced this sadness naturally as a season but I feel it will never pass. How do I escape being numb? I don’t just mean relationships...

    CONCEPT DESIGNS 2 месяца назад

    Anybody else fall asleep 7 min?

  • Stephanie Ross
    Stephanie Ross 2 месяца назад

    Wow. 😥😭😍❤❤❤❤ Sprinkle that love everywhere until we're all infected

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      wow! thanks for watching:) follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Junior Martinez
    Junior Martinez 2 месяца назад +1

    In order to love, one must unconditionally love himself or herself first..

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      couldn't agree more! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Kostantinos Kanelopoulos
    Kostantinos Kanelopoulos 2 месяца назад

    To those who can't picture somebody... picture you, you're all ways there.

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      so true! thanks for sharing! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • rennbot555
    rennbot555 2 месяца назад

    Wow. This was amazing glad I clicked it randomly

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      humbled:) follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • SirLockInBottom
    SirLockInBottom 2 месяца назад

    Money, money, and money - money matters most. 8D

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      you can't take it with you! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Catherine Foote
    Catherine Foote 3 месяца назад

    I’m so thankful that you’re a teacher. Your students are blessed with you understanding about being a man and being loving. I’ve taught for twenty years so far and there is nothing else I’d rather do.

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      i'm so thankful that you are a teacher too!!! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • simon dean
    simon dean 3 месяца назад

    amazing man god bless you xxxx

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      may god bless you too! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Desiree Gabriel
    Desiree Gabriel 3 месяца назад

    The quote about the sun was actually by hafiz :-)

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      ur right! my mistake! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • evan bowling
    evan bowling 3 месяца назад

    I don’t think I’m capable of loving someone or having a relationship. Im 20 years old and have never been in a relationship. I met a couple of girls i thought was attractive and I could picture living my life with them, but when i would hang out with them i never really felt intimacy; i mean i wanted to get intimate with them but i just couldn’t do it because i was so scared of failing or doing something wrong. It felt awkward to me. I don’t know what to do tbh.

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      the risks necessary to make a connection are scary...and well worth it:) follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Sathya Colella
    Sathya Colella 3 месяца назад

    At the end i've started to cry.

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      it's ok to cry!! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Bhagyashree Satghar
    Bhagyashree Satghar 3 месяца назад

    Thank you so much for explaining how to love unconditionally. You have inspired a lot within this few minutes.

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      thank you! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Kirsten Williams
    Kirsten Williams 3 месяца назад


    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • IKONisKillingMe
    IKONisKillingMe 3 месяца назад

    Boyfriend broke up with a week ago, after 3 years. Dated in high school mostly. Both of us are in college, he's only 3 hours away from me. But he said it felt like we were drifting apart

  • jana
    jana 3 месяца назад

    n consigo levar a sério homem cis hétero branco falando de amor

  • Mister Parker
    Mister Parker 3 месяца назад +7

    The toughest guy is the love . Swear I been insecure my entire life . No ones the blame it just happened & I never knew it was me . I'm upset cause I didn't love harder but I most definitely will today. I'm sick of anger I'm tired of feeling unloved , I need it I crave it .

    • Han Nguyen
      Han Nguyen 2 месяца назад

      Me too, sometimes I find myself wondering or even craving knowing what it's like to love someone selflessly.

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      keep sharing the love in your heart! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

    SLOPPY DONUT 3 месяца назад

    1:23 "we are here on this very Earth to love and be loved" Billy Ward

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      :) follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Jayashree Sreedharan
    Jayashree Sreedharan 3 месяца назад

    great. job. fantastic

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      thanks for watching! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Rin
    Rin 3 месяца назад

    there isn't anyone. its just empty.

  • Judit Dirda
    Judit Dirda 4 месяца назад

    Oh no, poor Daniel. :( ❤️

  • nouran samy
    nouran samy 4 месяца назад

    one of few men nowdays able to confess all things about love without small that feeling

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation :)

  • Leonie
    Leonie 4 месяца назад

    i was crying the whole time

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      happy tears too? follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Nikki Sainte-Marie
    Nikki Sainte-Marie 4 месяца назад

    this guy is boring but his message is very good

  • Sakura Kirigaya
    Sakura Kirigaya 4 месяца назад

    Start it with yourself and the rest will follow

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      so true! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Gollapalli Gopalakrishna
    Gollapalli Gopalakrishna 4 месяца назад

    Why I can't able to find any person to pictorize??

  • Văn Linh Lê
    Văn Linh Lê 4 месяца назад

    I did close my eyes and I suddenly found out that it helped me sleep

  • These Truths
    These Truths 4 месяца назад

    Fantastic true story. And it's true. Love creates, empowers, and endures all. This talk is definitely in the utube holy grail category! peace...

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      wow! thanks for your comments!!
      follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Avery
    Avery 4 месяца назад

    Ngl I thought of Jhope as the sun

  • DJ GURUSynth
    DJ GURUSynth 4 месяца назад

    That's very inspiring! :)
    It's amazing! :)
    I wish everyone a wonderful day! :)

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      you too! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Swarnima Dwivedi
    Swarnima Dwivedi 4 месяца назад

    Awee... I wish he was alive to see you guys together ..☺️

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      me too! but i feel his presence is with us:) follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Lana Schott
    Lana Schott 4 месяца назад

    So Beautifully said...every parent should have been given the blueprint on how to teach living unconditionally to the children... unfortunately this isn’t so because of generations of unhealed wounds passed on. I personally try to find the light in every person I know and meet none of us are perfect but we each have some perfect qualities in us
    I love the light in all and even my enemies 🤗

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      powerful post here! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Shikha Mishra
    Shikha Mishra 4 месяца назад

    The sound quality is very low. And that I am saying after using the headphones.

  • Lessons In Life
    Lessons In Life 4 месяца назад

    When we’re attuned to love, we are much more open to new ways of thinking and new ways of seeing problems.

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      love shifts every thing :) follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • MarieParieMusic
    MarieParieMusic 4 месяца назад

    what a beautiful speech. I love it, You're awesome

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      you're awesome too!! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • LABrone Walker
    LABrone Walker 4 месяца назад

    This sounds like a cult recruiting

  • Good Boi!
    Good Boi! 4 месяца назад

    i dont like myself but i love myself to bring the power of creativity
    and i dont need wife because i already have my babies :)
    and i dont need anyone to destroy my beautiful world of hope ... dreams and goals they are everything 2 me ...
    its really hard 2 love all the people
    i really want to do that but people always find a way to destroy my fresh ideas and will to do something good with art ...
    in shortcut they hate me ..
    and i love them and take inspiration from good things in people ...

  • hatfar1
    hatfar1 4 месяца назад

    I liked his message, but the video is so hard to hear.

  • Laina Augusto
    Laina Augusto 4 месяца назад

    This is the corniest Ted Talk I pushed through

  • achal subhadarsinsi
    achal subhadarsinsi 5 месяцев назад


    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      :) follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Jesse James
    Jesse James 5 месяцев назад

    This is powerful. Thank you. I want to be a bright light, to cut the chain of all my negative feelings and set myself free. To choose love.

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      i love this post! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • f duff
    f duff 5 месяцев назад +1

    Damn Danial, you got great personalty by the tell.

  • f duff
    f duff 5 месяцев назад +1

    All good people dies at early age. I guess being mediocre good is aldante .

  • Naniya Mernando
    Naniya Mernando 5 месяцев назад

    Does he kinda look like superman? He kinda has that look

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      :) humbled. follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • kotie boatz
    kotie boatz 5 месяцев назад

    Great message ,boring delivery :|

  • Nadia Rosaline
    Nadia Rosaline 5 месяцев назад

    Let me tell you this, only your parents who's gonna love you unconditionally. Period.

  • Paddy MG
    Paddy MG 5 месяцев назад

    My life changed when I learnt to care for myself, then I meet my wonderful partner. Love is so beautiful.
    When we have afternoon tea, we share a cake sometimes I cut one half bigger than the other, I always give him the biggest half, seeing him smile makes me smile.
    We have such endearment between us.

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      i love this!! keep sharing that cake!! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Komunitas baca PHILOSOPHIA
    Komunitas baca PHILOSOPHIA 5 месяцев назад

    Nice speech .. thank you very much from comunity of reading philosophy

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Tony
    Tony 5 месяцев назад

    Great story

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Melissa Brawner
    Melissa Brawner 5 месяцев назад

    My heart knew the first moment he talked about his cousin & them meeting, that she was the one. Getting closer & closer to loving me allows that light to radiate even more (and without conditions)

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      awesome! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Jolita Martinaityte
    Jolita Martinaityte 6 месяцев назад

    very handsome man! :)

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      :) follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • stanculture
    stanculture 6 месяцев назад

    We love and thank you, Daniel

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      amen! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

    TAKA WT 6 месяцев назад

    I want her love again. Impossible~😭

  • Marwa Um Rabby
    Marwa Um Rabby 6 месяцев назад

    His whole talk made me cry. This is reeally true and it went straight to my heart. Thank you so much

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      thanks much!!! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • yacaranday herrera
    yacaranday herrera 6 месяцев назад

    on this love team i’m on the benches

  • PerkkiXWWE
    PerkkiXWWE 6 месяцев назад

    Wonderful story

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • The Genuine Life of Hippie Yessie
    The Genuine Life of Hippie Yessie 6 месяцев назад

    My mom is my sun.
    My grandma was and is still my lighthouse.
    My grandpa is my disco ball.

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      love:) follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Fox
    Fox 6 месяцев назад

    cheesiest presentation ever :/ human beings aren't perfect and nobody is entitled to anything in this crazy universe

  • Roxy
    Roxy 6 месяцев назад

  • Caelyn Crochet
    Caelyn Crochet 6 месяцев назад

    Daniel should not of died, his life had so much meaning.

  • Matthew Eden
    Matthew Eden 6 месяцев назад

    This says absolutely nothing about being loved, nor how to love. He asks you to think of people who love you, and then tells a nice story and encourages us to love others. The title is inherently misleading.
    Just showing love and compassion doesn't mean anyone will love you in return. And just because you'd expect people who call themselves your friends to love or support you doesn't mean that was ever a condition in your love for them. Frankly, the only reason I even still believe in unconditional love (or committed/"brotherly" love) is because I, myself, show it to others. And I'm hopeful to see it in others, though the years seem to be telling me that I shouldn't be. If anyone knows any talks or resources with actual information or advice, unlike this one, I'd really appreciate if you could share it.

  • Fiorella Picado
    Fiorella Picado 6 месяцев назад

    This made me cry like a baby

  • James Hardy
    James Hardy 6 месяцев назад


  • Maria Viray
    Maria Viray 7 месяцев назад

    This guy is so damn handsome

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      thank you:) follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • Big Life Big Dreams with Sheryl
    Big Life Big Dreams with Sheryl 7 месяцев назад


    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      thanks!!! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation

  • BloxMystery
    BloxMystery 7 месяцев назад

    TedTalks but does TedListen

  • TheAcademicHorse
    TheAcademicHorse 7 месяцев назад

    This ted talk is so important but you have to admit, it’s the corniest ted talk you’ve ever seen

  • Genesis Miranda
    Genesis Miranda 7 месяцев назад

    Where's that ring at thoooo?

  • Val_ Esthela
    Val_ Esthela 7 месяцев назад

    Beautiful ending! Congrats!

    • wardcounseling1
      wardcounseling1 2 месяца назад

      thanks much!! follow me on instagram @billywardmotivation