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Times I should've realized I was autistic

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  • Published on May 11, 2022
  • since finishing this video ive been officially diagnosed so ye B)
    more resources:
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    - RAADS-R Test: embrace-autism.com/raads-r/#W...
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Comments • 11 319

  • illymation
    illymation  7 days ago +7720

    hi I’m sorry I didn’t do a good job explaining what I meant when it came to self diagnosis - it is valid and I self-dx’d myself for the longest time because my past therapist (who was not educated on autism at all) refused to have me evaluated because she said I “didn’t look autistic.” I saw a new psych who actually studies autism, and I was properly diagnosed. The point I meant to make was: self diagnosing and faking a disability are two different things that I feel become conflated by others who aren’t in our position - because they have access to diagnostics and doctors who listen. And I only “agree” that self diagnosing is wrong if someone is knowingly faking a disability. I used the fake service dog scenario to illustrate this because this is a common issue my friend in the video experiences way too often: people claiming to need a service dog, so they buy a fake vest online, put it on their untrained pet, and that untrained pet will attack and pick fights with my friend’s service dog, sometimes resulting in her and her actual service dog getting denied service places. This is the behavior I’m against- KNOWINGLY faking a disability; not self diagnosing. Thanks!

    • fishguts_x
      fishguts_x 2 hours ago

      I was so scared that I was a bad person because I technically haven't been diagnosed by a professional omg

    • Dream_Walker
      Dream_Walker 6 hours ago

      Thank you so much for clarifying this, I have sort of self diagnosed myself because I haven’t been to a hospital but I still don’t like talking about it because there’s a sort of, stigma, around self diagnosing

    • CavesAndVillagesSMP
      CavesAndVillagesSMP 20 hours ago

      Good to know because I have ocd but can’t get into a therapist or phyc rn

    • Meatball
      Meatball 21 hour ago

      @ThePmso ‘Too smart and communicative for autism’
      This sentence makes me so angry. Like come on you can’t call yourself professionals if you’re saying stupid stuff like that that stops people from getting a proper diagnosis.

    • Gaming Fudge
      Gaming Fudge 23 hours ago

      You just described my primary school life in this video

  • Whatever
    Whatever 7 days ago +11836

    Important note. The things that people see as autistic and are the main diagnostic criteria are the things that happen when autistic people are overwhelmed and unhappy. Those "symptoms" go away when they are able to communicate, cope, and are happy.

    • RedK5
      RedK5 2 days ago

      @QueenEspeon96 there’s nothing wrong with that. Also, how did it taste? Did you like it?

    • Aguest
      Aguest 3 days ago

      No idea if I have autism, but this makes sense to me. I am like a completely different person in terms of caring for myself and acting "normal" when I am feeling good.

    • Snowy
      Snowy 4 days ago

      this is why it’s so hard to get a diagnosis (when, in my opinion, it shouldn’t need to be a diagnosed thing in the first place). we have to be actively suffering to the point where our reactions are obvious to allistic people in order to get diagnosed, which is absurd.
      the diagnostic criteria are based off of what allistic people perceive of a specific demographic of autistic people, when they’re *suffering*. they ignore experiences from the autistic people’s points of view.

    • Pumpkin Spice
      Pumpkin Spice 4 days ago

      Please replace the period after note with a colon.

  • LozFanXV
    LozFanXV 3 days ago +228

    “It felt like the be yourself quote applied to everyone but me.”
    As someone who has ADHD and many overlapping symptoms with autism (sensitivity to certain sounds and bright lights, hyperfixations, auditory processing disorder, overly emotional, stimming.) That hit me hard. The amount of times I was the "weird" girl during school was a lot, and I found myself either the target of pranks, or left out of social events happening. And I sometimes find myself still struggling with feeling accepted nowadays.

    • Kiera
      Kiera 2 hours ago

      Omfg same

    • Tamsi
      Tamsi 8 hours ago

      The second I heard that sentence I though "yep, that's me"

    • Kitty Rxses #Save Ukraine! 🇺🇦 #tired
      Kitty Rxses #Save Ukraine! 🇺🇦 #tired 12 hours ago +1

      I relate a lot.

    • That Witchy Girl
      That Witchy Girl 13 hours ago +1

      I’m glad that some portion of my brain interpreted the “be yourself” as “be yourself in a *safe space* ” whether I realized it back then or not. Did I always see it that way? Of course not, but that idea being there helped me a ton growing up. Even if I couldn’t be *me* all the time, I could be *me* with certain friends or when I was alone. And that got me through it. 🖤

    • ダダ
      ダダ 14 hours ago +1

      I don't even know who I am :/

  • Christy Clasgens
    Christy Clasgens 3 days ago +255

    Another important note. The spectrum isn’t linear!! The autism spectrum isn’t “low functioning to high functioning” or “more autistic to less autistic.”
    A lot of people like to say it’s more like a color wheel. But personally I like to use the sound board analogy. Each slider is an autism trait/symptom. Each trait or symptom is a spectrum of its own. And the amount you experience each trait can change. So your personal spectrum can look different and change day to day.

    • Xei
      Xei 11 hours ago +1

      @NekoChanSenpai Thanks. That's more or less what I thought, just wanted to clarify.

    • Ashton Snapp
      Ashton Snapp 14 hours ago

      A sound board is a great analogy.

    • NekoChanSenpai
      NekoChanSenpai Day ago +1

      @Xei it is. Nonverbal doesn't mean the person has lower cognitive whatever. If you can find another way to communicate consent, it's perfectly fine

    • Xei
      Xei Day ago

      This may be a stupid question, but is it possible for there to be an autistic person who is mute, but mentally capable eneough to consent to sex?

    • PaperMania
      PaperMania Day ago

      I also dont like the term High Functioning or Low Functioning because I appear High Functioning most of the time but I appear Low Functioning aswel a bit.
      I like to describe autism as my brain preferring to be themself and refusing to follow the rules of a normal/neurotypycal brain.

  • Ronald Bearer
    Ronald Bearer 2 days ago +41

    Love this. Sometimes I feel like I won the autistic lottery. My “autistic passion” is psychology and it has turned me into an incredible masker. I keep wondering if I ever do something worthy of notice will we atypicals see it as we Can fit in or that we Have to fit in to succeed

  • Georgia Sumby
    Georgia Sumby 3 days ago +32

    Just to note many people with ADHD have Autism and people who have Autism also have ADHD but they are separate things you can have one with out having the other but you can have both together

  • Hopeless Peaches
    Hopeless Peaches 7 days ago +6918

    I can relate to needing headphones and getting weirded out at specific things. My parents used to keep asking why I needed headphones everywhere I went, but that's because they didn't see that when I was alone walking the dog, or on the train, the sounds of other people or sounds of rustling really got me upset and wanna escape home OOF.
    I don't know if that means I have autism per say, but I can relate to a good chunk of this video. But I also know I've had untreated depression since I was little, and got a prognosis for ADHD, so as you said: similar symptoms might be baking different types of cake.

    • Cola rat ✨
      Cola rat ✨ Day ago

      @NerdGeek Cosplay thanks ill try

    • Aurora Animates
      Aurora Animates Day ago

      @Edmundo Ramirez thanks, but i always freeze when it happens and it sucks

    • Phoenix C
      Phoenix C 2 days ago

      @Tice Arpey same

    • Edmundo Ramirez
      Edmundo Ramirez 2 days ago

      @Galeo Thats just a natural human reaction

    • Edmundo Ramirez
      Edmundo Ramirez 2 days ago

      @Aurora Animates The thing is that you could walk out the room or distance your self from triggering audio, you arent restrained to a chair and forced to listen to a person chew abnormally loud.

  • cookietiger
    cookietiger 3 days ago +156

    One of my family friends has this "funny" story about me when I was a kid. One time my dad put some ketchup on my plate but he didn't make sure the food was out of the way so the ketchup was touching the food and I started bawling my eyes out and refused to eat it. My dad had to wipe the ketchup off my plate and redo it properly. My family friend always tells this story as if it's soooo funny but it's always made me so uncomfortable. Only this year did I figure out that I'm autistic and that this funny situation was an actual sensory problem, one of many sensory things that I continue to struggle with.
    Shout out to everyone who's on this journey of discovery. I've found it quite difficult but it feels so good to finally be able to understand myself.

    • Total Trash Mammal
      Total Trash Mammal 3 hours ago

      Yeah my family also used to mock me for my sensory issues. I was called "overdramatic" because I "refused" to eat green beans. When the reality was that the texture and sensation is so horrible that it genuinely sets off my gagging reflex just chewing on it.
      They used to compare me to a dog because the vacuum used to make me cry because I would get so overstimulated by the noise. Especially since my mom liked to blast the volume on the TV when vacuuming so she could still hear her show.
      And yet, my brother got so much understanding and accomodation because "he has ADHD!" even when he was just being a spoiled brat...

    • Unkinderpine0
      Unkinderpine0 8 hours ago +1

      Haha wow I think I literally had a very similar experiece. I dont remember much, but i think i mixed my gravy into my mashed potatoes and got super upset and refused to eat it. Although i think part of it was i just wanted the two things seperated and my mom wouldnt let me waste it to get more food lol

    • Awakari Katase
      Awakari Katase 12 hours ago

      Eating food separately since I was born 😩💅🏻

    • Meatball
      Meatball 21 hour ago

      I have this same thing to, but a lot smaller and subtler. Pretty much if I have some chicken on a plate but chips touching it, I have to move the chips away. I do it because I don’t want things like chicken juice touching other stuff. I’m fine with having things like carrots and potatoes touch though, as long as they don’t have anything on them that could get to the other food.

    • Monkey D. Luffy
      Monkey D. Luffy 21 hour ago +2

      I have this with sounds & visionary stuff too. I can't eat with loud music, I hate eating with others looking at me & if my brother opens the door on me while having dinner, I get very stressed, angry, I have to stop eating & get him out of my room. I hate people chewing loudly & the sound that ordinary plates make when you cut something with a knife.
      I also always seperate my sides & mains & if they're already mixed, I'm a little bit overwhelmed, because "how will I have the perfect proportions?". If the food has something slimy & liquidy & solid stuff, the slimy liquid NEVER should be on top, ALWAYS on the side.
      Also, I work in McD & I put McFreeze & fries into my cheeseburger.

  • Will Loves Gaming
    Will Loves Gaming 3 days ago +27

    As someone who has autism who has extreme sensitivity to sounds, this is a really good way to explain how and what autism is. Keep up the work! :)

  • Not Yoshé
    Not Yoshé 8 hours ago +8

    I’m autistic too, and I’m so glad that I have someone as successful and talented as you to relate to. Autism comes in all shapes and sizes; people make hurtful stereotypes about us like that we’re “retarded,” or “autistic people are dumb.” I have trouble with social interaction a lot, and I tried to do stuff that other people did. Autism isn’t all about not making eye contact or social interaction; autism is all about people who are different and weird in their own way. Honestly, I wouldn’t cure my autism because it’s what makes me special and different. Keep being you, Lily, because anyone who thinks being you isn’t okay, they should definitely get a slap in the face. ❤️

  • Jclaypotch
    Jclaypotch 3 days ago +44

    I have autism... The main thing that really bothered me was how everyone thought of you. I don't remember getting picked on often but I do remember sitting there alone almost through the whole day in school.. also got followed around by this teacher through classes for being labeled special needs.. Also trying to talk to people and getting ignored. That's why I became the quite kid basically.. I hated the fact of that label. Growing up. You cant forget those moments. Always stick at the back of your mind.

  • 🎗 ordinary extraordinary 🎗

    i heard someone tell a girl with asd, “well, you don’t ACT autistic” and she just went, “Oh sorry! One second.” and then started hitting her head while listing off train facts. 10/10 response

    • Mario Mastr
      Mario Mastr Day ago

      @eenisoo 😮😮

    • Itzstayxd
      Itzstayxd 3 days ago +3

      @Nooby ツ ong

    • Nooby ツ
      Nooby ツ 3 days ago +3

      L + bozo + razio + skill issue + cope + no bches

    • Potato Rats
      Potato Rats 3 days ago +5

      Damn that is a amazing comeback

  • MisfitRi
    MisfitRi 2 days ago +8

    I’m going through the same journey! I was diagnosed with ADHD as a kid; however, something else was always wrong or “off” about me. I had the same reactions from others around me. Years later, I was 20, and started noticing my differences and how I see the world is different it took MONTHS to even fully admit I was also autistic. The more I researched, the more the world made sense. The more I started to love myself. It was scary. It still is, however I’m glad I found out I was autistic and have ADHD.

  • Wimmie's World
    Wimmie's World 14 hours ago +5

    I’ve always had sensory issues with noise and clothing and used to have to specifically make every conversation and task about The Wizard of Oz because that was the only way to get me invested. It’s interesting seeing these experiences years after the fact and starting to see the signs. Thank you so much for this video! I think it’ll help more folks than you’ll ever know.

  • sanzoskitten
    sanzoskitten 2 days ago +16

    I loved this, and also I liked seeing Eda the Owl Lady in the background. I wonder if I'm on the spectrum often but I also don't feel the need for a full diagnosis. I get overwhelmed easily but I grew up with a very understanding family and friends, a couple of which are diagnosed on the spectrum.

  • Shannon 025
    Shannon 025 2 days ago +5

    It's hard accepting yourself for you when you grew up being told that 'different' meant 'bad'. I personally only found out what being on the spectrum meant when I was well into being an adult and my sister and I were discussing how my eighty year-old grandmother had a lot of the symptoms. We then realized that EVERYONE in my family had some variation of the symptoms, me most noticeably. It was actually really freeing to have a label to put to my experiences.

  • Vixy
    Vixy 6 days ago +1147

    “It’s like the *be yourself* quote applied to everyone but me”
    Honestly that hit very close to home. I’ve always been labled as annoying and I never understood alot of things the way other people did, I get called stupid and/or slow for not understanding questions or following conversations properly/differently. I always thought maybe I had some sort of mental problem with me. Maybe I do, I don’t know. I’ve never been diagnosed with anything (yet)

    • Khloe G
      Khloe G 30 minutes ago

      @Nooby ツ what’s your problem??

    • Jclaypotch
      Jclaypotch 3 days ago

      I hear that. People tend to forget that everyone is different but yet some still strive.

    • Isaiah Jankowski
      Isaiah Jankowski 5 days ago +1

      @milk n oreos dosent hurt to check! :)

    • phillycheesesteak
      phillycheesesteak 5 days ago

      Same

    • v1ctor1a_4444
      v1ctor1a_4444 5 days ago +2

      relate 100%. all anyone ever says to me is "you're so annoying, just shut up"
      i have yet to be diagnosed but am on a waiting list

  • Glass and Sprinkles
    Glass and Sprinkles 2 days ago +6

    Ever since my brother got diagnosed with ADHD It encouraged me to be more aware of my own behaviours as I realised it was heavily impacting my life. I would deal with waves of anxiety and depression because I was never succeeding any of my personal goals and blaming it on laziness and that “i must not want to be successful” because that’s what I’ve been told my whole life.
    I’m not in a place at the moment where I can get access to a potential diagnosis for my issues (or at least some advice from a therapist). So I’ve had to just focus on being aware of my actions and feelings and keeping track of them. But it’s really frustrating when I try to express these concerns with people close to me and their responses are that I’m either just holding myself back, or that “everyone’s getting diagnosed these days but really it’s just that people don’t know self control”. It sounds silly, but it triggers a feeling that I’ve had to bear my entire life that I’m just not good as a person.
    I think we’ve developed so many social expectations that it pretty much goes against human nature and in how our brains develop.

  • JELLY
    JELLY 2 days ago +5

    wow illy. wow.
    you are so...
    good at expressing these things, i was diagnosed 5 years ago and relate to a lot of these things, im on your kind of end of the spectrum but i know some people on the other end and still understand whats going on in their mind, and you are really good with this stuff 👍

  • Oliver Leigh
    Oliver Leigh 3 days ago +3

    i suspected that i might have adhd, while doing more research i realized my “uncommon adhd symptoms” were just autism traits. for the moment i do not have a professional diagnosis but i am looking into that currently, it just has not been easily accessible for me. it’s just crazy to look back at my childhood and have so much insight as to why i felt so “different” from others n felt like i needed to try to “perform for others”, which i realize is masking.

  • Adalexen The Time Traveling Unicorn

    More autistic friends would be fun. I need more literal people in my life lol. It gets so tiresome having to think if people are being literal or hyperbolic, a simple convo would be great for once lol. Hell even getting to talk to someone that's passionate about anything!

  • The Music Decomposer
    The Music Decomposer 7 days ago +776

    6:18 “Pfft, you’re not autistic. Why aren’t you playing Roblox and screaming into the microphone? You know, a totally real symptom and not a stereotype.”
    (Yes, it's a joke.)

    • Cerebrum
      Cerebrum 2 days ago

      @Super Sonic Ding!

    • Sanriohub
      Sanriohub 3 days ago

      @Super Sonic it’s for people who can’t understand tone.

    • L.P.
      L.P. 6 days ago +8

      @tatis021 tatidd021 what braincells

    • tatis021 tatidd021
      tatis021 tatidd021 6 days ago +2

      yeah uh i can understand a joke and when somethings literal but this, this just killed my only remaining braincell.

  • Serene poe
    Serene poe 3 days ago +5

    0:51 very true! i thought i had autism for a while and talked to some of my friends who have autism and asked my therapist about it! i do not have autism but i am still a nerodivergent bean who gets really uncomfortable in certain scenarios and loves to talk about my hyperfixations! (also i love your videos and you have helped my realize i want to try animating! thanks Illy!)

  • Aurora Sheep
    Aurora Sheep 3 days ago +33

    I thought i was alone on the whole "forced to wear jeans" thing. I also recently found out I'm autistic, and looking back there were a lot of missed signs that i was. One of them was that. I remember up until like 3-4th grade never wanting to wear jeans cause they were so uncomfy, and when my parents finally started forcing me to wear them everyday instead of gym pants i cried for an hour and got yelled at for it. Even to this day i hate it. Yeah, I'll wear them on occasion to look nice cause it was basically beat into my head as a kid that appearance means everything, but the whole time I'll feel so uncomfortable and almost like itchy, and want them off as soon as I'm home. I very rarely wear them anymore and just wear what i feel comfy in when i finally moved out

    • Crow
      Crow 2 hours ago +1

      @Aurora Sheep Jeans are so gross, they are itchy and hot feeling. It gives me anxiety almost when I wear them. I never understood how people find them comfortable

    • Aurora Sheep
      Aurora Sheep 7 hours ago

      @Ipsitha Karnam I honestly don’t like the feel of them mostly in my thighs, they feel so uncomfortable like I’m being constricted, and then after so long they get almost like itchy that I just wanna rip them off. Usually when I do try and wear jeans for a nice event, as soon as I’m home through the door they get ripped off and I wear PJs or gym pants around the house with comfy shirts. I find too a lot of women’s shirts to be uncomfortable too. I’ve recently started buying more mens shirts cause women’s shirts also have that feel of being constricting and itchy/uncomfortable. Mens shirts are moser comfy and free feeling. I wear my husband’s shirts a lot lolz

    • Ipsitha Karnam
      Ipsitha Karnam 7 hours ago +1

      SAME! I thought it was just me as well. I STILL don't wear jeans as a middle schooler. It's a struggle for my parents to get me into jeggings I have zero jeans in my closet, and it's been that way since I was 3. I don't like the way they feel on the insides of my knees.

    • Feuerling
      Feuerling Day ago +1

      @PanicLedisko Your mother can't decide what you have or don't have, and she can't stop you from looking for professional help yourself. If you do have it, the right strategies and medication can make a great difference in your ability to just exist.

    • Aurora Sheep
      Aurora Sheep Day ago

      @PanicLedisko it’s okay, but yeah I’m the same way with PJ pants, I honestly feel more comfortable most days in PJs rather than what’s considered “normal clothes”. A lot of things I used to do as a kid too looking back really made me realize that I have autism. Like I have and always have had trouble making eye contact and growing up would rather just look down at the ground rather than at other people and still to this day can’t look others in the eye for too long without being uncomfortable or sometimes I just don’t, and I still walk with my head down a lot. Also realized that it actually wasn’t normal to copy others in a way to “appear normal”, also that most kids don’t walk around on tiptoes a lot or at all, which I did a lot and still do. Or that I have always vocally stimmed by grunting, coughing, making weird noises. Never even realized I did it until my husband pointed it out. Some things could also be related to my anxiety, PTSD, etc. but I realized I also did these things way before even any traumatic things occurred in my life. Plus I also do the sort of “flappy hand”, thing without realizing most days.

  • Alex :4444
    Alex :4444 3 days ago +3

    i've been having the thought of "hmm, maybe im autistic" for a while now, im finally gonna talk to my therapist about it, i can relate to so many stufff that you say, and some even more stuff from other autistic people, and that actually makes me nervous, my mom worked with autistic kids, sshe says im not bc im "normal", idk, just gonna talk to my therapist about it

  • Nekorina
    Nekorina 2 days ago +6

    Thank you so much for this video. I'm self dx'd autistic as well after reading abt it a LOT and talking with autistic friends about it. It's really helped me understand myself better and realize I'm not "weird" or the "problem starter" my family always made me out to be. I want to list a couple of reasons self dx can be just as helpful bc it seems like a lot of people don't really understand the difficulties and even dangers of getting a diagnosis.
    1.) a lot of doctors will misdiagnose people if they don't fit into their preconceived notions of what autism is supposed to be, and 2.) official diagnoses can be used against you by employers and even doctors, and some will even use it as an excuse to not give you opportunities or even give you treatment (yes including life saving surgeries) on the basis that you're "incapable". No, I'm not kidding.
    This is why we still have a LOT of work we need to do when it comes to discussing autism, researching it, providing support for autistic people, how we talk about autism, etc. And when I see videos like this one, it honestly makes me feel super hopeful that things *are* getting somewhere, and that we *are* making progress.

  • abelina sabrina
    abelina sabrina 6 days ago +760

    Love you little lady ❤️

  • Ami
    Ami 2 days ago +1

    It’s great that you’ve been open about this and help people who don’t have it be more aware about the struggles of a person on the spectrum. Unrelated, I love that you can draw your character with red hair realistically. I get teased for having red hair and being pale so it’s quite comforting seeing an animator be proud of having a character with the red hair traits.

  • Awesomestarwarsfan
    Awesomestarwarsfan 3 days ago +2

    Im on the spectrum and I can relate to this so much and I love how she explained it I wish everyone who knows someone with autism or anyone with it should watch this video!

  • Davide De Vincentis
    Davide De Vincentis 3 days ago +2

    I've been knowing for a while I have some of the symptoms, but kept dismissing it as just some coincidence, that is until you talked first hand about sensory overstimulation. The part about jeans being too itchy to wear until a certain age actually made chills run down my spine: that was like half my personality as a kid (the other half was me being extremely obsessed about one particular subject for a lenghty amount of time, being it marine mammals, Amazon rainforest amphibians or a single Disney movie). Now I'm unironically starting to suspect something...

  • Unknown
    Unknown 3 days ago +2

    I relate to a lot of the random things put in here that people may think that they are alone in thinking. I didn't ever wear jeans for a good 12 years bc I just couldn't stand the feeling. Being told that you're dramatic was a big part of my childhood, now this video has opened my eyes to a spectrum that I may fit on. I always knew about autism, didn't think I could have it till I watched this. Thank you💓💓💓

  • Owen Lewis
    Owen Lewis 7 days ago +436

    For anyone who needs to hear this, ADHD and autism have a surprising amount of overlaps: sensory issues, lack of focus, hyper focus, issues with socialization, and so much more. If you researched autism and thought “well, it kinda fits me, but not perfectly” I would recommend looking into ADHD, because that may be what’s up.

    • pondpigeon
      pondpigeon 2 days ago

      thanks! this has helped me clear up my suspicions, you see i've always related quite heavily to some autism symptoms but it's been over the last month or so that i've actually started to recognize them as such, but i've been already diagnosed with ADHD so that might be it! i'll still do some research before bringing it up to my psychologist just to be sure! :D

    • Keniko RB
      Keniko RB 4 days ago

      You can also have both!

    • The Supernatural house
      The Supernatural house 7 days ago +3

      @Leah thank you! And yes, I know that add is an outdated term I just didn't know what else to call it-
      But thanks, I ought try again to explain to my mom, but idk
      My friend also has adhd, and he says I definitely seem like I have it; might try to ask a teacher or just wait until I can do it myself, idk

    • Leah
      Leah 7 days ago +5

      @The Supernatural house ADD is actually not considered a diagnosis anymore- it all falls under the umbrella term of "ADHD" and you can have either hyperactive or inattentive type or a mix of both! So what you're describing is likely inattentive type ADHD 😊 I hope you can convince someone to have you tested if you think theres something up because I went without a diagnosis for 21 years and it would've been amazing to know when I was younger- good luck!

  • 🦴PIXIE🍰
    🦴PIXIE🍰 8 hours ago +1

    I can’t believe how relatable the masking part was. I was friends with dirty minded friends and I was one of the incont one and I hated being left out and I tried to mask them, and I got called toxic by them, I felt sad so I tried myself and I got left out.

  • Caramel Bloom
    Caramel Bloom 4 hours ago +1

    I just got diagnosed with ADHD, and the way you talk about how you think and act differently reminds me of how I feel about my adhd

  • SquirrelBeez
    SquirrelBeez 3 days ago +3

    This is so very helpful and your experiences are super similar to mine! I WILL be using this to explain things better to friends and family who just don’t understand how it is for me, and what they can do to make it a littttttle bit easier. In addition, the bit where you got diagnosed later bc of various reasons, yeah. I get that, I wasnt even diagnosed till last year! (Said diagnosis really saved me a lil and helped me better understand the reasons for why i am the way I am) but anyways, thanks Illy for sharing your experiences! It means the entire world dude :)

  • lost things
    lost things Day ago +1

    As a multidisabled person who also has autism, I see a lot of people struggle with connecting to their identity as a disabled person. This video did such a great job talking about autism as a disability with the human rights model of disability that I hope more people can understand how important disability community is!

  • AnJelloProductions
    AnJelloProductions 7 days ago +557

    I love how “non traditional” topics are being talked about by Illy. I definitely find these videos more personal and really helps those who can compare. This SHOULD be normal conversations.
    Amazing video and thank you for using your platform as a bigger voice for those who cannot!

  • Shoyu Becca
    Shoyu Becca 14 hours ago +1

    Even though you described my childhood down to a tee, I still have a hard time believing I'm autistic. I'm so used to believing that there's nothing wrong with me. I'm 26 and still trying really hard to fit into the "strong black woman" stereotype that my mom laid out for me.

  • FabulousSlob
    FabulousSlob Day ago +1

    I felt that part about the jeans. Also my brother sometimes makes those dark humored sarcastic remarks that I used to take seriously. At this point I just assume that anything horribly rascist he says is his sarcasm. Although my parents also fell for it a few times. Maybe he really DOES have a too-serious voice for sarcasm!

  • ToonTridrite
    ToonTridrite 2 days ago +1

    As someone who has signs as a child but isn’t one, I legit find it hard to watch someone being diagnosed with autism as an adult. I love your bravery and courage to share this to your big fan base.

  • loszhor
    loszhor Day ago +1

    I can relate. How different my life could have been if the grown ups around me took me seriously when I mentioned some of the signs.

  • Asher Doug
    Asher Doug 7 days ago +394

    I like that you put so many references to the Owl House and other shows into your videos. I also like that you make videos covering topics like this, that so many people seem to skirt around or take at face value. They legitimately help so many people. Thank you.

    • Super Sparerib
      Super Sparerib 6 days ago +1

      @Tim The Penguin Can I have timestamps? Here's young Eda in return: 6:39 And I think the blob at 7:51 is an abomination? Not sure lol. I already noticed Willow at 9:29 so don't need that one haha
      Edit: Nvm I found the rest at 9:44 plus Hooty, I *am* going to keep this comment up for people who are looking for timestamps

    • BirdsOnBread
      BirdsOnBread 6 days ago

      I loved seeing the Nahobino from SMT5 in an earlier video(I think it’s the bullying one?)

    • •Acè Øf Spàdès•
      •Acè Øf Spàdès• 6 days ago +1

      Me too

    • Andrew wood
      Andrew wood 6 days ago +1

      @Janakey 007 I mean can you blame her? Season 2B is so good 😊

    • Jok3r133
      Jok3r133 6 days ago +2

      when i noticed all the owl house characters i thought she was gonna add a tick at the end.

  • Gianna
    Gianna Day ago +1

    I have autism and adhd and when I’m over stimulated, really interested in something or really happy(I don’t know why all of those) I act autistic and sometimes I get weird looks but I’m kinda used to it because I was told when I was young that I had autism. I am on the high functioning side but because of my autism and adhd (and I think I have dyslexia but I am not officially diagnosed) I need lots of help in school but I get all that and it really helps.
    If your like me and have lots of disorders it doesn’t mean your stupid I embrace my disorders and love my self for it because it makes me feel special! Yeah sometimes I hate it and I wish I could be normal but I’m not and I love that about my self! Love your self and don’t think that your disorders control you because they don’t!!!❤️

  • Yuki Senmatsu
    Yuki Senmatsu Day ago +1

    I found out I had autism when I was around 13 or 14. Yeah, THAT late. I think either my parents or my elementary school speech therapist did tell me, but I had Patrick Star IQ where I didn't pay much attention to that. So yeah back then, I was in-between the middle and lower part of the spectrum until I was around 25-26 hell, I was in a homeroom ran by the S.T.E.P.S program with kids that was autistic when I was in highschool. While I was the smartest in there, I still needed a bit of help with very few things. I also hated doing the dishes back when I was doing some volunteer work at Antonio's, but since I'm now older, I don't mind doing that at all

  • Kathy S
    Kathy S 2 days ago

    I can totally relate to the being uncomfortable looking people in the eye when speaking with them. I find it super super awkward and uncomfortable. It feels like I'm boring into someone's soul. It's just far too intense for me even in a casual conversation. I tend to look at something just by the person's ear and that helps a lot

  • Anime Weeb
    Anime Weeb 3 days ago +2

    "i'm weird, i don't fit in. and I don't WANT to fit in. have you ever seen me without this stupid hoodie on?"
    my personality exactly.
    also I basically short-circuited after seeing all the TOH references in the backgrounds I loved them 👏

  • Figgity Jones
    Figgity Jones 7 days ago +272

    I also recently realized I was on the spectrum. Even though I was literally told by my college counselor out of the blue on like my first day with her, it still took me like 4 years to finally get it because I just had so little understanding of what ASD is. Still learning more and more everyday 😊

    • 𝐍𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭
      𝐍𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 7 days ago

      Lol yeah!

    • Inês Costa
      Inês Costa 7 days ago

      I was also told recently about my diagnosis even tho I went to therapy as a toddler and I'm rooting for u.
      I hope u realize that for some reason you are living and that no matter what disorder you may have,you are worthy to experience your life to the fullest just like the other ppl
      btw thx for the positive comment,I wouldn't be able to write such a short but powerful comment

    • Diamond Kone
      Diamond Kone 7 days ago +3

      That's great to hear. Some signs may not be as obvious as we think, and we are still exploring everyday. I'm glad to see you're supporting yourself and not letting it get to you. Staying positive is sometimes the best medication, have a great day! :)

  • Umm
    Umm 3 days ago

    Coming from someone who is on the spectrum this is the most relatable thing I’ve seen in a while. Thank you for bringing awareness to it. when I fidget/ shake my hands or make weird sounds w/ my mouth, people get annoyed and I try to mask but since I’m a boy, I can’t lol but thank you 😊

  • Savonna M
    Savonna M Day ago

    I got an ADHD diagnosis back in August but I knew that there was more going on. I often felt different from the rest of the kids. Other kids noticed I was different and I was picked on often for it. I have a hard time understanding certain social cues, making eye contact, understanding sarcasm and jokes, and I often over share in social situations. I could not get myself to wear jeans until my sophomore year of highschool and I hated wearing clothes that had buttons. However I didn't get further testing because the lady that gave the results said that I didn't seem autistic. My parents didn't really help either. They would often say when I was I kid, I did the same thing and would just think that I was overthinking. The place where I did my testing said that I could come back if I really wanted too but now insurance may not cover it anymore. I have done so much research over the past two years and have been learning so much about myself in the process. I can safely say that I am autistic. Thanks Ily for sharing!

  • Britt Taylor
    Britt Taylor 3 days ago

    I was diagnosed with high-functioning autism at the age of 4. It's nice knowing there are others like me that I can relate with and see myself in. We need more aspie awareness and proper representation, and less neurotypical stereotyping and prejudice. :)
    On the subject of cats (my favourite!), I have a cat who I think may be the kitty version of autistic.

  • Amanda Burris
    Amanda Burris Day ago

    I was diagnosed with Autism when I was five. I relate to all of this so much! There are still things that I'm learning about myself and how my autism works and I love learning about other people's similar journeys!

  • eLL cartoons
    eLL cartoons 7 days ago +1341

    This video is EVERYTHING. I seriously appreciate you using your platform to bring so much more awareness to us awesome weirdos!!! ❤️🙃🥳 Your toons are the best 😭🙌🏼 P.S. I WILL NEVER DO THE DISHES WITHOUT GLOVES.

    • Diana Shearer
      Diana Shearer 5 days ago

      ELL HELLO

    • TheAnimationNation
      TheAnimationNation 6 days ago

      ok

    • WingDingfontbro67 Null
      WingDingfontbro67 Null 6 days ago +2

      Who doesn’t? I dont want crap water in my hands who wants that getting all in their nails and oh god I touched my face because I needed to scratch my nose and now it’s in my face. You can see how this goes down the drain very quickly,

    • Sitharos
      Sitharos 6 days ago +1

      Hey Ell! Love sweet potato! 😃

  • a smol leaf
    a smol leaf 3 days ago

    I was diagnosed with add when I was a little kid and I've been highly suspecting that I'm on the spectrum for the last several months. Thank you for posting this ⭐

  • •D0ll K1ss•
    •D0ll K1ss• 3 days ago +3

    As someone who most likely has Autism, I really appreciate that you made this video. There’s a lot of misconceptions about Autism, and it can get annoying. Thank you, Illy 💕

  • Gravity
    Gravity 3 days ago +12

    I feel like I don’t know if I have ADHD or Autism.
    One symptom that I’ve had is getting a sensory overload to very specific items; dirt (specifically dry), flour, my own hands/body when dry, and even water.
    Another thing is that I constantly zone out, like I break mid conversation or I don’t hear someone talking to me. While typing this, I had to pause the video and turn off the sound because I legit could not type a single word. Also, I know I have a neurological disorder related to anxiety.
    Am I overreacting or are these actual symptoms? Because I feel like I’m kind of in between. Also I don’t know if I have ADHD or autism.

    • Helen M
      Helen M 4 hours ago

      Have you had a look at the DSM 5 criteria? No one can say if you've got ADHD or autism just from a couple of examples. The sensory sensitivity does sound like an autism symptom though, but I'm not sure about the zoning out. As they said in the video, you have to have a bunch of different "ingredients" (symptoms) to make the recipe for autism

    • Shattered Soul
      Shattered Soul Day ago +3

      Same boat, friend. And unfortunately I don’t have any answers. This video has made me realize a few things, but the comments have also had way more “but… wait, that’s me”, moments.
      Sensory issues like bright lights or high pitched noises, fixations, unable to people or words.
      I wish us both well…

  • Tamzin Molloy
    Tamzin Molloy 14 hours ago +1

    Omg! Thank you so much for making this video! I've been on the spectrum since i was little and my younger brother too and am still going through some tough things with it, but I accept and like being weird too! I struggled so much in high school and could barely fit in with my autism but now I'm at uni and am better than ever!! New friends and pursuing what I love! Animation!!
    So thank you illy!!
    ❤❤😊🥰💜💜

  • 𝚂 𝚊 𝚕 𝚎 𝚖   ☹︎

    “It felt like the be yourself quote applied to everyone but me.”
    Hits way to close to home. Over the years I’ve been very selective about sharing my interests with people because whenever I went on long rants they’d ignore me or tell me that I was annoying. I’ve only ever opened up to one close friend, who I’m still in contact with even though they moved 3 years ago. I just feel like there’s no safe space for me to express my feelings and ideas. There’s certain thing I know I can’t say because I’m me. Like, if i said a certain joke they wouldn’t laugh, they’d just give me a polite smile. If my friend said that joke, everyone would act like it was the funniest thing in the world.
    Edit: also the ‘You don’t seem autistic.’ Reminded me of an experience. I let slip that my brother was autistic (something that still haunts me to this day) and we also had an autistic kid in our class. He was closer to what people view as typically autistic, he had trouble talking and doing certain things. One of my friends immediately got it into their head that my brother was like that kid and asked about it. The others, who had met my brother, were pretty shocked (which I don’t blame them for). They all said stuff like; ‘Wait, hold up! He acts so normal, not like (insert kid in our class’s name)’ ‘Are you lying? But he doesn’t have any trouble with school!’ ‘He was probably diagnosed wrong’
    I was so mad at them but didn’t speak up, because I was afraid. I’ve always been afraid of my friends because I’m if I tell them what I’m really thinking, they’ll hate me.

    • Anime Weeb
      Anime Weeb 2 days ago +1

      @Kanykei Doorova it's exhausting -_-

    • Kanykei Doorova
      Kanykei Doorova 3 days ago +1

      @Anime Weeb I KNOW RIGHT

    • Kanykei Doorova
      Kanykei Doorova 3 days ago +1

      i definitely agree

    • Anime Weeb
      Anime Weeb 3 days ago +4

      when people say be yourself, they're actually saying "be yourself as long as yourself fits inside the box society created for you"

    • Llova1
      Llova1 3 days ago

      I can fully relate to this

  • davey_fvcking_jacobs

    The last two years of my life have been a constant stream of ‘oh that’s an autistic thing’ since I realised I’m autistic. I went 15 years just being the quiet, smart mature kid and never having any support and it sucked. Knowing why I am the way I am is the biggest relief I’ve ever had even though I’m still hesitant even to say I’m autistic because of the stigma around self diagnosing. Being afab (even though I’m not female) is the biggest set back but we’re working on it

  • Blooper Dooper
    Blooper Dooper Hour ago

    I am just like you! I was diagnosed with ADHD in 4th grade. Even with medication I felt off. I was and still am deeply interested in phycology so I would often go on huge rants in front of my friends. I talked to my therapist about it and they recommended an autism check or whatever. I did it and was diagnosed with slight autism on the spectrum. Thank you for making this video!

  • Layton T Montgomery
    Layton T Montgomery 3 days ago

    illy, thank you so much for making this animation. i was diagnosed with ADHD about a year ago but i’m getting the exact same feeling you had that there’s still something more. this video has helped me become aware of a lot of my behaviours and i’m hoping to get tested for autism after i finish my exams. this is by far the most relatable thing i’ve ever watched and it sort of feels like i’m listening to myself because of how similar our experiences are! thank you so much for making this video and helping me discover more about myself, love you

  • João Vitor Farina Braga

    i´m not diagnosed and i do not recommend people to self diagnose themselves, but i do belive that i´m on the autism spcetrum and/or have ADHD myself, because i have always felt disconnected and different from the other people, and my friends noticed that as well, with this feeling growing more as i got older, i do not have sensory overloads tho or have acknowledged them, even when i was a kid, i don´t have textues that i don´t like, at least none that i have found yet, or things like that, i don´t like loud and specific types of noises but it is more of a mild inconvinience than an issue that causes meltdowns, ( i really don´t like things like high pitched voices, buzzing sounds and people talking over others, so i think that loud sounds are "okay-ish" but the frequency is what bothers me a lot, and those 3 can make me need to cover my ears), but is kinda ironic how despite being lacking in that part i make up for it by having the other issues, specially regarding communication and socialization, I stim, have social impairment, special interests/hyperfixations, don´t like being touched, trouble focusing, difficulty maintaining friendships, masking, selective mutism, trouble recalling commonly used words, etc, with everthing in different intensities of course, i wish i could get an official diagnoses, just to be with peace with myself, but they are expensive af, and my parents wouldn´t want to cooperate

  • Red Magnolia
    Red Magnolia 10 hours ago +1

    As someone who is being diagnosed with both autism and ADHD this was very relatable especially the pants thing I remember at one point I wore rain boots for 2 years just because normal shoes are restricting and annoying (I will stand by the claim till the day I die)

  • Unkinderpine0
    Unkinderpine0 8 hours ago

    Honestly, over the past few years I've felt that I might have autism or something similar. I've always thought the material of certain blankets is unbearable, I find most snoring to be so unbearable to the point that when staying hotels with my family ive wanted to sleep on the floor in the bathroom to avoid the sound, I tap on everything, I eat to focus when doing work or watching shows/movies, a bite my nails, I still wear footie (onezee) pajamas, fireworks hurt my ears if we're close enough, i can struggle to read the room, i have few irl friends, eye contact can be weird, im always touching my face if i just have to sit still, and plenty of other little things.
    That being said, I used to want to be diagnosed, but now I've come to this conclusion: i don't want to be diagoned unless my symptoms disturb my life in a dramatic way that i cannot treat myself. I don't want the label and honestly haven't needed it. I don't have many issues that would be able to be solved by telling an authority "oh i have x condition". I also rather just think about it as the way I am, not a condition. I know I'm weird but if I gave away all the little annoying bits about myself, I fear that I'd also give up my creativity, my artistic pursuits, my dedication to various hobbies, etc. And i like all of that, I stand out in groups for being weird but also for exceling in many areas. I wouldnt ever give up either side.

  • aurora
    aurora 3 days ago

    I really appreciate this video so much, as someone who's been wondering if I'm autistic for a while. It's confusing though, because I do have a lot of the traits, but then again I'm the dead opposite of other traits. Then again the traits that I do have could just be my ADHD, since the two do overlap a little bit and the traits I do have are sometimes ADHD traits, and I have ADHD. (and just wanted to say lol am I the ONLY one who noticed all the owl house references- 6:24 eda in the background, and a bunch of characters at 9:44 lol I love the owl mouse sm)

  • Official Cat Lover
    Official Cat Lover 2 days ago

    the one symptom that has always been thing for me is hearing. I’m so sensitive to little noises and sometimes hear things others don’t or think things are way too loud when others say it’s not. i had to start homeschool because i was autistic. i was the shy kid, i had one solid friend all throughout public school and homeschool.
    i’ve overcome a lot of the sensory issues but i’m still working on others.
    also i share the cat obsession thing

  • Sea Dragon Slayer
    Sea Dragon Slayer 5 days ago +275

    I have ADHD and people think I'm just stupid and say I don't seem like I have ADHD which is very sad and its hard to cope I'm glad she made this video to make this more aware. Thank you Illy.

    • Layton T Montgomery
      Layton T Montgomery 3 days ago +1

      @Cashcorn agreed. my mum always says i should be happy that i can hyper focus because “it’s like a superpower” which it really isn’t. yes it has it’s perks but it’s mainly just an inconvenience

    • Cashcorn
      Cashcorn 3 days ago

      @Layton T Montgomery the worst time period of my life was being on ADHD/autism medicine just so I could do decent in school. Hyper focus sounds nice until you realize it’s uncontrollable and it either kicks in at the worst times or you usually are waiting for it to kick in.

    • Layton T Montgomery
      Layton T Montgomery 3 days ago +1

      same!! i’ve been told “you don’t look like you have ADHD” by so many people and a few have even said that ADHD is cool and they wish that they had it too which really upsets me. so many people stereotype about ADHD and it’s literally the worst, people need to just shut up and stop speaking about other peoples experiences. i used to be “friends” with this girl and one time we were talking about my ADHD diagnosis and she pointed out that i wasn’t bobbing my leg under the table and she had the freaking nerve to say “i have a friend who has the hyperactive type of ADHD and she’s always bobbing her legs under the table and you aren’t doing that so obviously you don’t have the hyperactivity, i think it’s really insensitive that you’re going around telling people you have the hyperactivity when you clearly don’t”. just typing that out makes my blood boil. i stopped being friends with her ages ago but the fact that people like that exist just annoys the heck out of me. they don’t realise that not everyone with ADHD has the same symptoms and they compare you to others and invalidate your experience just because you don’t act like a stereotypical person with ADHD.

    • Cashcorn
      Cashcorn 3 days ago

      @Whispurr C4t I couldn’t have said it better myself.

    • Yue Stardust 星
      Yue Stardust 星 3 days ago +1

      Me too, my teachers and parents always yell at me to just focus but I can't. And other students make fun of me for being hyperactive saying that I act like a kid

  • Annie kitten
    Annie kitten 3 days ago +1

    I relate so much ❤️ thank you for making this video. Especially the "but you're not like my cousin part" and the self dx. (Getting diagnosed feels impossible I've been waiting for a couple of months)

  • Moosed Up Gaming
    Moosed Up Gaming 2 days ago

    I actually love this video. It was so relatable when you listed the symptoms you had. Thank you for making this video :)

  • MickaD
    MickaD 3 days ago

    I was diagnosed with Asperger's when I was 2 so I always knew I had autisim but no one explained it to me. Ever since I have joined the autistic community I have had the thought "I thought I was only one that did that" almost daily.
    Schools really should teach their student a lot more about autism. AND I WAS IN A CLASS OF ONLY AUTISTICS!!!!!!

  • Cyclops
    Cyclops 18 hours ago +1

    It is very different from person to person
    I have Autism and ADHD, but I was diagnosed much earlier than Illy (diagnosed 13, 15 currently) and it really helped explain why I didn’t feel like I fit in with the kids in my class. Mainly I was incredibly forgetful of my belongings, and still am.
    But I am also sensitive to sound, not enough that I need headphones (although I still wear them constantly) but enough that I’m terrified of thunder and similar loud noises. And I’ve realized from the short interactions I’ve had with people outside my class that it feels like no matter what I say, they WILL find it weird and snicker at me. But it’s never bothered me, only confused me.
    Sorry if this is way too long but I wanted to share my experience here.

  • Sushi Roll
    Sushi Roll 7 days ago +126

    I think the scariest thing in my experience with ASD is the fact that my masking has become completely subconscious. Like, I don't even realize that I've been masking until I've been alone for a decent amount of time, then my normal personality shows itself. It almost feels like my need to mask has changed me into an entirely different person than I was before.

    • Water
      Water 7 days ago

      It’s so tiring to mask your the point where I wonder who I am

    • Hawklegs
      Hawklegs 7 days ago +3

      Dude, I feel the same way! Even with just a few hours alone, I find myself talking, making noises, singing, moving my hands, acting out scenarios physically that are only happening in my head, basically acting like a completely different person. I mask automatically, and maybe that's why I have so many traits of an extrovert, but act like an introvert as well: it's my autism masking draining my battery, not being around other people in of itself.

    • Tice Arpey
      Tice Arpey 7 days ago +6

      I masked a LOT in middle and high school, and my social life has suffered immensely from it. Like Illy teasing that one kid about tripping, I also went too far at times while trying to make a funny.

  • Jaidenyuh
    Jaidenyuh 22 hours ago

    I LOVE THIS VIDEO! EVERYTHING ABOUT IT IS AMAZING! THE REFERENCES TO THE OWL HOUSE ARE IMMACULATE AND THE EVERYTHING ELSE IS EVEN BETTER! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK ILLY!

  • Pajama warrior
    Pajama warrior  17 hours ago

    I also have ADHD and autism and I relate a lot to this. I couldn’t do eye contact, hated doing the dishes because of sensory issues, and would miss sarcasm. A problem that deal with is doing things slowly and not being able to catch up to other students

  • Xen Brzozowski
    Xen Brzozowski 2 days ago +1

    I also just got diagnosed worh autism, and i cant explain how comforting this was :)

  • •NyxNox•
    •NyxNox• 3 days ago +1

    On the first week of June my sister is going to travel to get her autism assessment. I also think that I might have adhd, my mum works with people on the spectrum and she loves her job. My sister needs a lot of accommodations and I have always helped her by going along with the things she needs, she has been diagnosed with ADHD, and we are excited to go to see the doctor to get diagnosed in real life. We have to travel for a while to go see the office.

  • Circus Yeet
    Circus Yeet 7 days ago +407

    A wise Spoctor once said “I want to be normalized, not glorified”
    also this video basically describes me lmao
    Because my school completely ignored my needs, it caused trauma :)
    I had no friends, nobody really liked me, I was angry and violent as a kid so people feared me, teachers outright refused to give me extra help because “we have to treat everyone the exact same” etc. ugh
    Edit: wrote a sentence completely wrong
    I’m over it now but it hurts to think about. Girls with autism don’t get nearly as much help and diagnosis as boys do, since they often learn to mask their behavior to fit in. Swedish psychiatrist Svenny Kopp specializes in the subject…
    Another edit bc I wanna add:
    The whole “ooo everyone must be treated the same” thing looks nice on paper I guess. But in practice all it does is ignore those who NEED extra help because “the other students will be jealous.” Yes, autistic student, you see if we put you in a darker and more quiet room, everyone else has to be in that room too because we have to treat everyone the same!! 9 years of school was like that constantly for me and it literally hasn’t improved whatsoever.
    Only rowdy boys get the help they need while Angry to Quiet girls get no attention at all…

    • no one
      no one 4 days ago +1

      I had a math professor with severe ADHD once tell me he tries to make a world where everyone is treated fairly, not equally, because people have different needs and abilities.

    • Circus Yeet
      Circus Yeet 6 days ago

      @Cola Creature took em 14 years in my case lmao

    • Circus Yeet
      Circus Yeet 6 days ago +1

      @bananatheo3 ohh lmao i wrote the wrong thing. I meant they kept saying “we have to treat everyone the same”. Must’ve gotten distracted

    • Manga Mouthful
      Manga Mouthful 7 days ago +2

      I was a bully when I was younger because people told me it would be cool to do so. It was NOT cool.

    • Emily_Pug
      Emily_Pug 7 days ago +1

      This Comment basically describes me!

  • M C_
    M C_ 2 days ago

    Hot damn, this is so extremely relatable for me - the kind of "everyone else does X thing, but when i do the same i get weird looks" just discribes my whole life

  • Fambi
    Fambi 2 days ago

    Im pretty sure my sister may have autism and we had a very healthy conversation about it. We're both neurodivergent, We didn't come to a solid set in stone conclusion, and neither of us are doctors but it is very good to talk about mental health and evaluate yourself. Identifying the "problem" is the first step! And im happy you were able to do that Ily💕

  • benjamin andres
    benjamin andres Day ago

    i was diagnosticated with autism at 11 years old. the thing is: the medical system in my country sucks, and the psychologists said other many diseases before they really knew that was autism (they almost diagnosticated me with schizophrenia)
    sometimes, normal things like hand-clapping or loud noises, (or even if someone touches my hair suddenly), i got scared and my brain just turn off, and when i´m too excited for something, i start shaking and stuttering
    im really obsessed with physic teoric experiments, and i can be talking to someone about that for hours. and sometimes, i ask at my friends: "can i talk to you about theoric physics?" and they just listen me
    i love having friends that loves me for who i am

  • Spike
    Spike 3 days ago

    I've been diagnosed with ADHD since I was a little kid but lately, since I decided to look more into my neurodivergancy, and talking to other autistic people, I've been thinking autism may be a fit to me as well. I know traits can overlap between the disorders, but some of the things I experience add up to just the autism spectrum as well.

  • Nick Chambers
    Nick Chambers 5 days ago +298

    I loved the owl house references! And thank you for bringing up the “it’s not just young white boys” part. It ignores so many other people, especially when someone’s looking to be diagnosed as an adult. Our needs change as we grow, and an adult who has trouble with socializing would be able to mask or adapt more than, say, a six year old. Our struggles still exist, they’re just sometimes harder to see

    • Euphemia Lyra Eyre
      Euphemia Lyra Eyre Day ago

      @Anvi oh I think it might be a fushion of Mei and Totoro, but it was in the totoro bus stop setting.

    • Anvi
      Anvi Day ago

      @Euphemia Lyra Eyre i thought that was mei? do you mean the red panda? or maybe i didn't catch totoro

    • Pesterbot
      Pesterbot 3 days ago +1

      and a bluey reference! :DD

    • Euphemia Lyra Eyre
      Euphemia Lyra Eyre 3 days ago +1

      And steven universe references, and totoro.

    • Anvi
      Anvi 3 days ago +3

      I do too lol. Did you see the latest episode? I saw young Eda somewhere in this video

  • Mew Mich
    Mew Mich 2 days ago

    I'd like to add that there's no age to get diagnosed and it's always okay to get second opinions on your diagnosis.
    I have Aspergers but didn't get diagnosed until I was 23.
    As a kid I also showed plenty of signs of being autistic, but my mom thought it was normal behaviour, and even though my teachers told her I had to go with a therapist, she refused because she thought I was just "being more creative than other kids". At 15 I finally went with a therapist, but unfortunately I was misdiagnosed with ADHD so I had to take meds that were helping on some aspects, but ruining me on others. Later, for a school project, me and some friends had to investigate about autism and that's where a couple bells started ringing for me. The last straw was when I jokingly (not so much) said "wow guys, I think I may be autistic" and the teacher stopped and said "You didn't know? Weird, I thought you did, I noticed during the semester". I asked my mom if I could get a diagnosis, she brushed it off saying "you don't look autistic, you're not screaming and bumping your head on the wall, and you can talk", but that time I chose to go check on my own, and yes, I was misdiagnosed with ADHD when trully I have Aspergers. I told the doctor about my anxiety attacks caused by loud noises, that repetitive noises made me disociate, that I had trouble understanding bullying, jokes and sarcasm, that I didn't really speak until I was 2 even though I knew how, as well as other stuff, and she straight away said "no yeah, you're an asperger's kid". The doctor explained to me that it was very often that women were diagnosed with ADHD because of the same reasons Illy explained on her video.
    So yeah, if you have your suspicions, please consult a therapist, and don't be afraid to get a second opinion.

  • Ms UltimateCringe
    Ms UltimateCringe 3 days ago

    On the part with the “ask your autistic friends”, my autistic friend actually asked me if I was sure I wasn’t autistic, since he had previously started to notice quite a bit of signs. Unfortunately I don’t have the access to proper help as of yet (my parents don’t exactly believe in mental illness, at least for their own children) but one day I’d like that confirmation, just to explain why I’m like the way I am

  • K D
    K D 2 days ago

    I recently (like two days ago) took the RAADS-R test off of the recommendation of one of my friends who is autistic, and got a relatively high score, so I'm planning on talking to someone about it. Hopefully, this'll help me understand myself better.
    Also all the Owl House reference timestamps I caught because I am obsessed:
    6:25 young Eda chilling in the background
    7:50 abomination clay and top student star(?)
    9:24 Willow
    9:44 Hunter, Amity, Luz, Hooty, maybe Gus in the background? also *pride flags*

  • Neve18
    Neve18 3 days ago

    i was diagnosed 3 years ago and i’ve watched you since then as well. this video makes me so happy :)

  • Required Particular
    Required Particular 7 days ago +241

    The problem that makes autism “self diagnosis” different from other disorders, especially in the US, is that the testing is cost prohibitive and providers have a hard time justifying it to insurances if you aren’t “disabled enough.” If you don’t need enough services then even providers will scoff.

    • Required Particular
      Required Particular 6 days ago +3

      @Crystal Thunderheart lawyers. It’s the only way to get it anymore.

    • Crystal Thunderheart
      Crystal Thunderheart 7 days ago +3

      My grandma had ms. It got worse and worse and for all my life I known her she couldn't get anywhere without a wheelchair and VERY VERY easily forgot things. She couldn't work.
      Cooking was extremely difficult, even eating.
      Eventually she couldn't take care of herself at all besides taking a very very long time to eat.
      And despite all that.
      She couldn't Get disability.
      So with knowing that. I don't know how people get disability at all.

    • Manga Mouthful
      Manga Mouthful 7 days ago +3

      Yeah, I can't afford a legit diagnosis but I'm certain I have autism

    • Ruby QQ
      Ruby QQ 7 days ago +3

      I have some sympotoms, and that is why I'm going through a process to find out if I do have autism.

  • Jath
    Jath 3 days ago

    Thank you for making this video Illy. A lot of people don’t really understand what autism is and the spectrum with in it. People often have stereotypes of what autism is and isn’t, which is really annoying to someone who has autism and have to deal with many situations like the one you used as an example. I like how you discuss a little about women and autism. Women definitely have harder times with autism mainly because of outdated criteria that is mainly meant for males, which in turn led to many autistic women getting diagnosed WAY later than boys.
    I love everything you discussed in the video from beginning to end and I’m very thankful that you made this video. Keep it up! ❤️

  • ella toad
    ella toad 3 days ago

    Illy i just want to let you know, i cried watching this video, everything in this video resonated so much with me and i agree in how racist and sexist the system is. When i was younger i almost got diagnosed with Aspergers (ik its a outdated term) but atlast i wasnt bc i would “grow out of it and some girls are just like that”

  • Bean Boi
    Bean Boi 3 days ago

    This video nearly made me cry. I’ve been fairly sure that I’m autistic for a while and this only helps confirm it. It made me think about all the times when I was a kid that similar situations and responses would happen to me. I always felt like I was broken or weird and I felt very alone.. but seeing this, seeing someone I respect share their own experience helps so much. I feel more comfort and a lot better knowing that I’m not broken, I’m just different and other people like me do exist.
    Thank you for this video Illy, it helped in ways you don’t even know 💙

  • Miraculous: Tales of Obliviousness

    I just finished watching Atypical so idk if you referenced it on purpose 😂 but thanks for educating us more on this Illy! I have a few friends that I never realized they were autistic till they told me, and it made me realize that I've assumed how autistic people "are" because I only knew of one in my life. Anyways, thanks for sharing your story 😊

  • Carley Osburn
    Carley Osburn 7 days ago +145

    As an autistic female myself, this made me feel heard in a way that I can’t quite explain. Thank you for sharing your experiences, Ilyssa.

    • Cody Hines
      Cody Hines 7 days ago

      I hope you have a good life

  • • SPARROW •
    • SPARROW • 2 days ago

    Hi my brother has autism and I've been kind of confused about it my whole life and this video really helped me understand 😁 Thank you ❤

  • kaibubblegum
    kaibubblegum Day ago

    this video was really good and im glad you finally got diagnosed and as somebody with asd noise cancelling headphones are amazing and they should be a requirement to have in every classroom as if i had them in year 5 i would have been very happy as once in year five i started getting overwhelmed because the supply teacher and some students kept shouting at each other which was really overwhelming and my cousin who was sat next to me couldnt even help me because when she tried to help me she got shouted at by the teacher and i couldnt even stand up for her because due to getting overwhelmed i couldnt speak
    also in my year 5 class we kept getting supply teachers as the actual teachers quit and our class was very loud and some of the kids would always be running around the classroom or shouting at teachers or other students

  • GigantHD
    GigantHD 3 days ago

    It's funny how I spent my whole life getting told that I was the weird kid and I had no idea that there are other weird kids and that I might have autism but I thought people with autism are the people that stick out a lot with their movements but I guess I have autism since I have most of the sympthoms

  • Lauren Lozano
    Lauren Lozano 2 days ago

    I can relate to this, but I didn’t know my diagnosis till my parents told me as a teenager. I realized why I was so different and I felt like living two different lives. I felt betrayed for not knowing when I was younger, but learned to accept myself

  • Luci bird
    Luci bird 7 days ago +194

    I’m getting evaluated for asd super soon, and watching RU-cliprs I like talk about it feels so nice 😊

    • Sykic_
      Sykic_ 7 days ago

      I got diagnosed a year ago with asd and adhd forever ago

    • Sykic_
      Sykic_ 7 days ago

      I got diagnosed a year ago with asd and I got diagnosed with adhd forever ago

    • QuinnDoesThings
      QuinnDoesThings 7 days ago +2

      same here!!!

    • Serendipity Art and Gaming
      Serendipity Art and Gaming 7 days ago +5

      Good luck I think? I got a full physc evaluation earlier this year and have ASD and a lot more- a LOT more. Good lucks tho- and you are not alone!! ❤️

    • Bongus
      Bongus 7 days ago +2

      It's the exact same thing for me :)

  • Samantha B
    Samantha B 20 hours ago

    Illy it is amazing the timing of this video. I am 34 and went for my intial intake appointment a month ago. And will be starting my official assessments in June, to see if I am indeed on the Autism spectrum.
    I have done many online evalutions and always test high. So it will be interesting to see what comes out of these appointments.
    Gotta say I relate to every bit of your video.

  • Natalia
    Natalia 3 days ago

    as a fellow autistic my first reaction when seeing the title was 'hELL YEAH'
    ive recently found your vids and for some reason finding people i follow or look up to also be autistic makes me weirdly validated xD (i can definently relate to the jeans...and the flushing toilets....and the dishes- litterally my favourite part of my hospitality class i took was i managed to be on the 'drying' role' for the entire term xD )

  • Rosa R.
    Rosa R. 3 days ago

    I haven’t been diagnosed with autism but I sometimes have my suspicions. Seeing this video I related to a lot of the things you mentioned but ESPECIALLY the sound of the toilet flushing making you feel uncomfortable! 😂 To this day I still flush the toilet with either my knee or foot while simultaneously covering my ears with my hands. It’s the first time I’ve heard of someone else sharing this same experience as me!

  • Tyg3rMastr 2
    Tyg3rMastr 2 2 days ago

    This reminds me of my little cousin called Carlos, he couldn't speak at all so he'd repeat the same noises, he'd wave his hands around whenever he was interacting with us and he would get agitated easily and would only calm down if you played Ne-yo's songs. Its been like 10+ years since I've seen him but I really miss him