Time To Seize The Day - feat. Rachel Bloom - "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend"

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  • Published on Oct 19, 2018
  • Buy the season 4 album here: lnk.to/ceg4
    Time To Seize The Day
    Starring Rachel Bloom
    Written by Rachel Bloom, Jack Dolgen, Adam Schlesinger, Michael Hitchcock, & Erin Ehrlich
    Rebecca:
    WHEN THE MOMENT'S COME TO START ANEW
    SET YOURSELF FREE AND FINALLY DO
    THE THINGS IN LIFE THAT YOU ARE DESTINED FOR
    THE FIRST STEP IS THE HARDEST PART
    BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULDN'T START
    TAKE THE LEAP AND GET RIGHT TO IT
    HERE'S EXACTLY HOW YOU DO IT
    YOU STEP OUT THE DOOR
    THEN BACK THROUGH THE DOOR
    SIT ON THE FLOOR AND STARE AT THE FLOOR
    ROCK YOURSELF UNTIL YOU FEEL OKAY
    AND CARPE DIEM, CARPE DON'T EM
    TIME TO GRAB LIFE BY THE SCROTUM
    BUT FIRST, LET'S READ SOME FACTS ABOUT STINGRAYS
    AND THEN IT'S TIME TO SEIZE THE DAY!
    I WONDER IF THE FRIDGE NEEDS CLEANING
    I HAVEN'T CLEANED THE FRIDGE FOR A WHILE
    I'D HATE TO LEAVE WITH A DIRTY FRIDGE
    DID I GET IT ALL?
    NO THERE'S A SMIDGE
    MAYBE I SHOULD GET A NEW FRIDGE ONLINE
    NOPE, NEVER MIND, IT'S TIME TO FLY
    NOW, I'LL SIT RIGHT HERE ON MY COUCH
    RESEARCH FRIDGES, I'M NO SLOUCH
    IT'S GETTING DARK
    THE TIME JUST GOT AWAY
    I COULD STILL GO OUT, IT'S NOT TOO LATE
    BUT FIRST I NEED TO MASTURBATE
    TO SOME PORN, PREFERABLY MALE AND GAY
    AND THEN IT'S TIME TO SEIZE THE DAY!
    YOU JUST TAKE ONE STEP FORWARD, TWO STEPS BACK
    NO, TWO STEPS FORWARD, FOUR STEPS BACK
    FIVE MORE STEPS BACK
    AND NOW I'M BACK IN BED
    OK, NOW I'M READY TO GO
    THEY'RE DELIVERING MY NEW FRIDGE THOUGH
    WHERE'S THAT FRIDGE?
    I CAN'T WAIT AROUND ALL DAY
    I HAVE TO GO OUT AND MAKE MY BIG FORAY
    HERE I AM, STANDING AT THE DOORWAY
    IT'S FINALLY TIME TO SEIZE THE DAY!
    BUT FIRST MORE PORN!
  • ComedyComedy

Comments • 296

  • Katterina Qualls
    Katterina Qualls 5 days ago

    This is my theme song (also maybe that's why I can't keep a job)

  • Treyworld
    Treyworld 9 days ago

    Anxiety is a real bitch, ain't it?

  • Briana Marie
    Briana Marie 10 days ago

    right now i have lots of work to do, but guess what I'm doing? Listening to this song on repeat.

  • jusk8lp
    jusk8lp 17 days ago

    "I masturbated for five hours."
    "Yeah, we heard."

  • Sabrina M. M.
    Sabrina M. M. Month ago

    Way too relatable...

    Shit.

  • King Red
    King Red Month ago

    me every morning

  • DeathGodRiku
    DeathGodRiku Month ago

    If I'm watching gay porn, it's twinks

  • Féile Kilkenny
    Féile Kilkenny Month ago

    SHE ONE AN EMMMMYYYYYY AAAHHHHH AND SHES PREGNANT!!!!!!!!! A QUEEN

  • Boyo-Shook
    Boyo-Shook 2 months ago +1

    Nothing like agoraphobic procrastination to pause your whole life for weeks at a time.

  • Scrimmy Bingus
    Scrimmy Bingus 3 months ago +1

    Me procrastinating from doing my homework

  • Trish Mc
    Trish Mc 3 months ago +1

    this very relatable 😄

  • TalkingToMyself
    TalkingToMyself 3 months ago

    I needed the song to remind me how badly I’m procrastinating from fixing my life out of fear. My whole existence is “well it’s too late to get BLANK done now.”

  • Gabriella Hall
    Gabriella Hall 4 months ago

    Wait, is this inspired by Into the Woods?

  • repetitive reality
    repetitive reality 4 months ago +1

    "but first more porn." Hillarious. Namaste

  • Carmela M
    Carmela M 5 months ago

    I’m like 99% sure Tad is Nathaniel’s voice

  • Anna Dvir
    Anna Dvir 5 months ago +2

    As a person with social anxiety
    I must say this captures my feelings everyday so accurately

  • SuperHappyNotMerry
    SuperHappyNotMerry 6 months ago

    1:13 I've never felt so _seen_

  • emma louise
    emma louise 6 months ago +2

    That awkward moment when your having a hard day with anxiety about leaving the house. Then this song plays in a playlist and you feel v called out.

  • Brandon Vidal
    Brandon Vidal 6 months ago

    I don't know any woman who has openly admitted to masterbaiting to gay porn.

  • jasobres
    jasobres 6 months ago +5

    Did she ever get that fridge?
    EDIT: Yep. In "I'm So Happy for You", she kvetches about a goddamn millennial denting her "new fridge"!

  • brent raptor
    brent raptor 6 months ago

    this is like lonely island's "great day" in reverse

  • seth sister
    seth sister 6 months ago +1

    newsies tease

    • Sarah Hamilfan
      Sarah Hamilfan 6 months ago

      Yesss I clicked on this video hoping it was a Newsies reference
      I stayed for the amazingly relatable song...

  • Rhys S.
    Rhys S. 6 months ago +1

    Jesus this hits close to home

  • PeaceLightning95
    PeaceLightning95 7 months ago +5

    All curl up into a ball for the Agoraphobia National Anthem...

  • Clara Hanahan
    Clara Hanahan 7 months ago

    Is no one gonna talk about how Brent and Tad are clearly voiced by Vincent Rodriguez III and Scott Michael Foster?

  • DarkRunsOut
    DarkRunsOut 7 months ago +5

    This whole song and video are a perfect representation of what it's like to have agoraphobia. Honestly I've never related to anything as much as I relate to this.

  • becs 86
    becs 86 7 months ago +1

    Hello anxiety and depression

  • leeardamer
    leeardamer 7 months ago

    1:38 eeeeew

  • Deborah
    Deborah 8 months ago +1

    Not accurate, I would be procastinating and overthinking which fridge is the best fridge

  • Jayde Hocking
    Jayde Hocking 9 months ago +6

    Ooof I love how the experience of social anxiety can sound like such a fun upbeat song haha

  • Kevin Coem
    Kevin Coem 9 months ago +2

    I know it's easy to interpret this as a procrastination song at first, but I think she's clearly all about fears and anxiety keeping her from seizing the day. It's about all the things she focused on to keep her distracted from the fact that she's got this anxiety that doesn't even let her leave the house. I think I can relate to like 99% of this song's lyrics, and I definitely don't think this is a song about procrastination.

    • Sarah Hamilfan
      Sarah Hamilfan 6 months ago

      Well she procrastinating on going outside because of anxiety disorders, but then that's still procrastinating...

    • cat k.
      cat k. 8 months ago +1

      I think a lot of the time people do procrastinate because of anxiety/fear of failure so - shrug emotion, you know? Its not about procrastination in a way of executive disorder or distraction, though I think, if that what you mean.

  • bingbongboop
    bingbongboop 9 months ago

    OMG I AM LIKE THIS TOOOOO

  • Jeisson Latorre
    Jeisson Latorre 10 months ago +1

    IS THE TITLE A NEWSIES REFERENCE!?!?!?

  • !xOIPx !
    !xOIPx ! 10 months ago +1

    “ ha ha, these guys!” Lmao

  • Eimard Gomes
    Eimard Gomes 10 months ago +1

    The porn dialogue was the best. LMAO

  • thehulsta
    thehulsta 11 months ago +1

    i need a "carpe don't 'em" tshirt.

  • ketashi
    ketashi 11 months ago +1

    Definitely getting a “There is Life Outside Your Apartment” vibe from this. Even the last lines are about porn.

  • dumbalek
    dumbalek 11 months ago

    My ADHD wrote this song

  • R C
    R C 11 months ago +1

    Why is this me whenever I try to attend uni

  • hardlybreathe93
    hardlybreathe93 11 months ago +1

    Stop it
    It hurts

  • Pitch Black Productions
    Pitch Black Productions 11 months ago +4

    Did I ghost write this song?

  • M W
    M W Year ago +671

    I'm actually a bit surprised by the amount of people who interpreted this as a procrastination song, when to me it's clearly about social anxiety which is really not the same thing at all. The entire episode was about Rebecca not wanting to go outside due to anxiety. It was never completing tasks that was the issue, just the act of going out into the world and among people. I literally had to pause the episode when this song came on because it was just TOO relatable. I have on more than a few occasions done the "step out the door then back through the door" for several minutes with my heart racing

    • HonBon96
      HonBon96 15 days ago

      M W definitely. It’s about agoraphobia due to social anxiety

    • Eve Rosenfeld
      Eve Rosenfeld 22 days ago

      It's about agoraphobia.

    • Calvin Lynn
      Calvin Lynn Month ago +1

      According to my therapist, procrastination usually has an underlying emotional component. I didn’t start getting through my procrastination issues (and boy howdy do I have procrastination issues) until I acknowledged their roots in anxiety. It’s not procrastination when she steps back inside, but the stingray thing is 1000% procrastination: filling your time with useless shit so you don’t have the face the spooky overwhelming unavoidable task.

    • El Bruce
      El Bruce Month ago

      She DID want to go out, she jist couldn't make herself do it.

    • Summer Wolf
      Summer Wolf 3 months ago +2

      @The lady who knows everything your username is a good one haha

  • Renno Wataru
    Renno Wataru Year ago

    Hasn’t Rebecca had sex since the beginning of season 4 ? That’s why she spent a day with the tablet ...

  • Cj M
    Cj M Year ago

    I am happy confused and sad. This season is too real. Can I borrow you for the narrative for the rest of my life?

  • Zara Fey
    Zara Fey Year ago +1

    mood

  • ria75002
    ria75002 Year ago +1

    I feel attacked and this time it’s not by my anxiety

  • L. Amanda
    L. Amanda Year ago +35

    I love that they showcase masturbation as a procrastination technique because, same.

  • Pablo Hernandez
    Pablo Hernandez Year ago +1

    This is like my theme song at this point in life.

  • Alana Glickman
    Alana Glickman Year ago +1

    This song is my anthem

  • Raphael Marley Alves

    :D _these guys_

  • Curly McJensenpants
    Curly McJensenpants Year ago +1

    I FEEL PERSONALLY ATTACKED

  • Alex Voutsinos
    Alex Voutsinos Year ago +3

    this is so accurate it hurts

  • Jacob Lundy
    Jacob Lundy Year ago

    goddammit I drooled all over my bed

  • NinjaKeyblader
    NinjaKeyblader Year ago +3

    This is painfully relatable

  • Uisce Preston
    Uisce Preston Year ago

    The best part is when she puts her hand down her pants.

  • Orlando Guy
    Orlando Guy Year ago

    Pure genius....

  • King Red
    King Red Year ago

    same girl

  • andv1p3
    andv1p3 Year ago

    Sorry Héctor I was masturbating for 6 hours LOL

  • roses
    roses Year ago

    If this ain't me

  • MsCunningLinguistic
    MsCunningLinguistic Year ago +1

    God i feel so personally attacked by this song about procrastination masturbation to male gay porn. hOW DO YOU KNOW, RACHEL