How to stop screwing yourself over | Mel Robbins | TEDxSF

  • Опубликовано: 12 июн 2011
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    Mel Robbins is a married working mother of three, an ivy-educated criminal lawyer, and one of the top career and relationship experts in America. Widely respected for her grab-'em-by-the-collar advice and tough love, Robbins drills through the mental clutter that stands between people and what they want. Her approach is smart, effective and entertaining. Five days a week, Mel hosts her own syndicated radio show The Mel Robbins Show, discussing hot topics and giving advice to callers across America. She is starring in a new series, In-Laws, airing this summer on A&E. In addition, she writes a monthly column for Success Magazine, is a former CNBC contributor and is the co-founder of Advice for Living, Inc., which develops products and television programming with experts in the wellness, health, relationship and career categories.
    Most nights, once the kids are in bed, you'll find Mel at home with a bourbon on the rocks and her Australian Shepherd at her feet, writing about life, love and everything else on her award-winning blog:
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Комментарии • 8 745

  • Diary of a Laywoman
    Diary of a Laywoman День назад

    This is the best talk i have ever heard- i have ordered the book today

  • Crystal Clear
    Crystal Clear День назад

    PURE GOLD! I was sitting here watching this writing notes on a yellow sticky pad! I am not kidding.

  • Isabel Pacheco
    Isabel Pacheco 2 дня назад

    Why would I have to force myself to dance? Now this speech makes no sense at all.

  • Vladis Ramirez
    Vladis Ramirez 3 дня назад

    She is amazing

  • Mo Zhe
    Mo Zhe 3 дня назад

    Most inspiring speach ever.What was with all the miserable faces in the crowd??

  • raymond schmidt
    raymond schmidt 3 дня назад

    wow, this was awesome to me.

  • Miguel Oyola
    Miguel Oyola 3 дня назад

    This was the hardest TEDx to watch. Terrible presenter sorry.

  • Lisa Inline
    Lisa Inline 4 дня назад

    anyone else notice it's 400 billion?

  • Olivier Hoarau
    Olivier Hoarau 4 дня назад

    great talk! as a side note to Mel: 400 trillion is 400,000,000,000,000... lots of zeros...

  • Kelly Vincent
    Kelly Vincent 4 дня назад

    Love this. And I get the point that your feelings of laziness shouldn't be listened to. But listening to your feelings always gives you information. You deserve to listen to your feelings and let them know they are valid. Doesn't mean you have to act on them or take her as objective truth, but it shows you your true state and it's self loving to not ignore your genuine feelings, there's always a reason for them. Guide them like a child in a loving way

  • Austin Reeve
    Austin Reeve 5 дней назад

    What a waste of time this talk was. Spoke so much and said so little

  • Alexia Savva
    Alexia Savva 5 дней назад

    I am new in youtube life coach and your videos inspired me❤

  • 401South Media
    401South Media 7 дней назад

    At first reading the comments I was surprised at some of the negativity, then I scrolled past before 5 seconds were up because I remembered this is the internet where some folks are never satisfied no matter what, this was a GREAT TALK

  • Savannah Smith
    Savannah Smith 7 дней назад

    this is validating that i am doing some of this stuff like being myself, people put me down about it but that is because i do it within those five seconds. when most people would stop themselves.

  • Shannon Alisandrelli
    Shannon Alisandrelli 7 дней назад

    400,000,000,000 = 400 billion?

  • Loz Bomb
    Loz Bomb 7 дней назад

    Love this... Haven't watched it for a few years but glad I revisited

  • Uma A
    Uma A 7 дней назад

    Love the way she talks with ease and practical examples. I can totally relate to most of the things she says. Wow! So true! I must breakaway from these destructive habits, right now!

  • Jackie Rodriguez
    Jackie Rodriguez 7 дней назад

    you are awesome thank you..

  • X Aowdey
    X Aowdey 8 дней назад

    I start singing when I saw the word “FINE “
    ... I’m feeling just Fine Fine Fine 🎼🙏🏻♥️
    Army the only one who will understand 😂♥️

  • guii Silva
    guii Silva 8 дней назад

    8:15 trillion? Really?

  • Sudeep Tirkey
    Sudeep Tirkey 8 дней назад

    Truly Inspirational & Motivational..

  • trisram
    trisram 8 дней назад

    400 and 9 zeroes is 400 billion. Not trillion.

  • trisram
    trisram 8 дней назад

    I never finished grad school but doesn't that slide read 1 in 400 billion, not trillion.

  • trisram
    trisram 8 дней назад

    this lady is a fine looking woman

  • Nandini A
    Nandini A 8 дней назад

    Is anyone in here coming from mindset reset? I just noticed how young she looks. Mel Robbins is one of the best things that ever happened to me. Mel I love you!

  • Anthony Falabella
    Anthony Falabella 8 дней назад

    am I the only one who noticed that the number on the screen was 1:400,000,000,000 which is 400 billion?

  • Friendly Fish India
    Friendly Fish India 9 дней назад

    I think this was the best inspirational video I ever saw. Simple. Active. Honest.

  • Joel Thomson
    Joel Thomson 10 дней назад

    She's a bit like Frank TJ Mackey.

  • Joel Thomson
    Joel Thomson 10 дней назад

    Everyone is obsessed with wanting things.

  • Gags_ 0436
    Gags_ 0436 10 дней назад

    Loved her speech! Wow! ❤

  • Renata Rowland
    Renata Rowland 10 дней назад

    This is one real smart, tough woman. She’s an amazing inspiration to me. Listening to her talks has changed my life.

  • Andrea Sker
    Andrea Sker 11 дней назад

    Damn she woke me up

  • Chris Soriano
    Chris Soriano 12 дней назад

    that videographer tho

  • Lian Lee
    Lian Lee 12 дней назад

    我覺得她說話的方式和joyce 牧師很像,幽默積極很有影響力。

  • Vicent Ortiz
    Vicent Ortiz 12 дней назад

    Absolutely Amazing

  • Joe Kelly
    Joe Kelly 12 дней назад

    She is ANNOYING!

  • claire-anne Baron
    claire-anne Baron 12 дней назад

    LOL ! OMG ! I just want you to turn it down, stop yelling, stop putting you on the front and become more humble, more listening, I just stopped the video to return in my peaceful and fulfilled life ^^

  • Michael wilson
    Michael wilson 13 дней назад

    Having the impulse to go bunjee jumping may be worth waiting for someone to buckle you in. Just saying. Safety first.

  • Benedict Tokpa Danuweli
    Benedict Tokpa Danuweli 13 дней назад

    Fabulous presentation! Thanks, Mel

  • jorge jo
    jorge jo 13 дней назад

    Well,i stumbled onto this,you know ''auto play'' ..... i begin with magic spilling into my ears...

  • RQ MasterLim
    RQ MasterLim 14 дней назад


  • Janey Williams
    Janey Williams 14 дней назад

    Not much worse than having to say you’re fine when you’re not. I won’t do it.

  • Cheryl Burch
    Cheryl Burch 15 дней назад


  • Erin Laemmle
    Erin Laemmle 16 дней назад

    I’m going to watch this a few time more! 😁🙏🏻💚👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

  • luluhoneyxo
    luluhoneyxo 16 дней назад

    Very inspiring and I can tell she's a lawyer! Thank you Mel! You've validated some practices that I've been feeling naturally inclined to do and I feel so empowered! Wishing you success and happiness and I hope more people listen to the incredible ideas you have to share ♥

  • Sibyl Saint
    Sibyl Saint 16 дней назад

    Anybody else think she was a bit overbearing? :/

  • Amal Mitra
    Amal Mitra 17 дней назад +1

    Thank you 🙏💕

  • shinukism shnuck
    shinukism shnuck 17 дней назад

    i want to kill her, can she help me do that?

  • Sindy Petronella
    Sindy Petronella 17 дней назад

    Love this Mel.

  • backto Nature
    backto Nature 17 дней назад +1

    I can't support her voice, 5,4,3,2,1 I quit watching. it hurts my ears.

  • 徐唯哲
    徐唯哲 17 дней назад


  • Dini でぃに
    Dini でぃに 17 дней назад

    "Force yourself". Yes, I've tried that, always fail at the end. Not enough willpower.

  • casey
    casey 18 дней назад +23

    I want to have money to survive without actually having to work. There, I typed it. Ok see you guys later, I have to get to work.

    • Tamil movie review with Maggie
      Tamil movie review with Maggie 4 дня назад

      Me too!

    • Ajvy
      Ajvy 4 дня назад +2

      I often feel like that is something that I want. But I also know it's not true. My mind and mental health isn't stable and strong enough for such a lifestyle, my mind would deteriorate and I would struggle to find other motivation to even get out of bed...

    • Well Hello
      Well Hello 7 дней назад

      casey me too

  • Henny Rahmawati Putri
    Henny Rahmawati Putri 18 дней назад

    One of the best ted talk I have ever come across to...

  • Kindra Calypso
    Kindra Calypso 19 дней назад +6

    THANK YOU. I had already decided that in 2019, I would live my life on purpose and with purpose. Watching your talk has given me the first steps. I have saved this video to watch as often as I need. This video is my anti-snooze button.

  • alfredo cruise
    alfredo cruise 19 дней назад

    Wow I love this,''I have to force" my self

  • Hà Nguyễn
    Hà Nguyễn 19 дней назад

    So great. Thank you very much.

  • Hayyan Almamsani
    Hayyan Almamsani 19 дней назад

    Oh my god is this the sweetest person I've ever seen

  • Lana Brunello
    Lana Brunello 19 дней назад

    All last year I pushed myself to lose weight to think more positively I danced I forced myself to do thing I didn’t want to do ... but I’m still stuck nothing changed except I got more attention from men...albeit the wrong men lol

  • mercy maina
    mercy maina 19 дней назад

    amazing! loved this the most!

  • Ragnhildur S. Bergsdóttir
    Ragnhildur S. Bergsdóttir 19 дней назад

    *watches this in bed*

  • Green Boy
    Green Boy 19 дней назад

    ok, but what do I really want then?

  • sunsetkizz1
    sunsetkizz1 20 дней назад

    Thank you!!!!!

  • I Create My Life
    I Create My Life 20 дней назад

    Well, this is the time when I should use adjective powerful to describe something or someone

  • muadhnate
    muadhnate 20 дней назад

    I stand up in the morning and wobble. It’s bad.

  • M Frusciante
    M Frusciante 21 день назад

    Complacency. It's that feeling you get when you think you should start working out, but don't take action. It's like a force, such as gravity. It may not be obvious, but it's always there, working on you, holding you in place. It hinders progress. But if we are aware of it, we can fight it. And if we fight it, we will achieve.

  • Maariex31
    Maariex31 21 день назад

    Great, now that I found this video, my familly will be happy to hear her every morning

  • Bobby Robby
    Bobby Robby 22 дня назад

    Women's empowerment can go to blazes

  • reductio absurdum
    reductio absurdum 22 дня назад

    surely, to be healthy, you have to pace yourself in achieving your 'wants'?

  • reductio absurdum
    reductio absurdum 22 дня назад

    how do you prioritise your wants? some folk say that a routine for folk with mental health issues is good. others might not approve of your wants, which can be upsetting and hurtful. moreover, they may attack you en masse if you continually go after your wants, saying that you don't contribute enough to society. and some say that you can't always get what you want. some folk don't like folk who get what they want and call them selfish.

  • reductio absurdum
    reductio absurdum 22 дня назад

    yes but:
    1 l like sleeping
    2 If you do too much you might get ill or get cancer
    3 I have tried being impulsive and folk get affronted at your 'cheek' and say no
    4 Isn't it good to reflect/think of the consequences of your actions?
    5 What you want and getting it might lead to your death
    6 You need money to get what you want, and most money has been made through exploiting the planet's resources or poisoning the earth
    7 You have to put your wants in relation to the other folk in your life, no?
    8 What you want might not be sustainable long-term
    9 Rest is good for you, etc

    Mel, please tell me more about how.

  • maverator
    maverator 22 дня назад

    Some people just come across as if they think they are God’s gift just by walking in the room. I suppose there must be real substance there, since (a) she is obviously successful and (b) this video has a ton of views. So I will hear her out, but damn she really rubs me the wrong way. Maybe it’s the constant shameless self promotion.

  • Quandíno Mayhemś
    Quandíno Mayhemś 22 дня назад

    I loved that

  • angela doyle
    angela doyle 23 дня назад

    The self parenting thing seems obvious but that blew my mind! I never thought about it this way!

  • ThatHotBelieber
    ThatHotBelieber 23 дня назад

    That is the best Ted talk I've ever heard. And commenting here was an impulse reaction.

  • Lance Bursch
    Lance Bursch 23 дня назад

    1/3 of America is unsatisfied with their lives!!? Really?? Then they need to get a Real Life.

  • Andre Marais
    Andre Marais 24 дня назад

    Lost me on loud entrance.

  • Elena Anastasi
    Elena Anastasi 24 дня назад

    I liked this a lot, but then I want and I will.

  • Chehak Malhotra
    Chehak Malhotra 24 дня назад

    Help me

  • Jireh Choo
    Jireh Choo 25 дней назад

    This may be 9 years late
    But it is never too late to make a change
    If life is going down hill,
    Or not going your way,
    You have no direction or purpose in life,
    Life has no meaning,
    Let me tell you:
    No matter how much you screw up
    No matter how many mistakes you have made
    No matter how much life is screwed
    There is still someone looking over
    Someone still pursues you
    All your unworthiness
    He has paid it all off
    And in exchange gave us a new life and hope
    A new purpose
    He is our Provider
    Jehovah Jireh
    On that cross he sacrificed,
    Took the punishment, humiliation and suffering we deserved
    This unceasing undying reckless love
    Of Jesus Christ
    Has found all of us
    The Creator of everything
    Yet he loves us
    If you let him in
    He will change and transform your life
    And you shall live a whole new fruitful life like never before
    For he is Good all the time
    And has seen you in your Mother's womb
    He knows your strengths and weaknesses
    Your inner personailty
    He doesn't look at your outer appearance
    He looks way deeper
    Your heart is what he treasures most
    Your inner cry is what he listens to.

  • tiffany scott
    tiffany scott 25 дней назад

    Mel is one of my favorites her enthusiasm keeps me attentive

  • Karendal Sadik
    Karendal Sadik 25 дней назад

    I am not fine.I don’t say or think anything she is saying

  • Donna Deloy
    Donna Deloy 27 дней назад

    I love this video! I very much needed to hear this!

  • Sucker Punch
    Sucker Punch 27 дней назад

    I'm still contemplating.

  • E M
    E M 27 дней назад

    Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you!!!!!!!!!! Just got out of bed the minute my alarm rang for the first time in years. I got six hours of sleep and I was a little groggy the first few minutes I woke up, but I feel so energized. I had totally forgotten how good it feels to be motivated in the morning. Thank you for reminding me to do more things on impulse and force.

  • Floris Groeneweg
    Floris Groeneweg 28 дней назад

    I'm watching this from my bed

  • Sri Hari
    Sri Hari 28 дней назад

    i am asking by tying in my own system what should i do to make my life better

  • Fred Thomson
    Fred Thomson 29 дней назад

    I dont say fine any more. I say Better When You're Here. Four lil eords that never fail unless your gal turns and says Why dont ypu say Sweet things to me anymore?

  • king boya
    king boya 29 дней назад

    1 in a 400 trillion.. and i still managed to get this unlucky...

  • Mina the fiddler
    Mina the fiddler Месяц назад

    if 1/3 of Americas feel dissatisfied with their lives maybe they should change something about their country

  • How To Get My Ex Back
    How To Get My Ex Back Месяц назад

    thank you mel robbins.

  • 李漢濬
    李漢濬 Месяц назад

    Gordon Ramsay?

  • hey stob it
    hey stob it Месяц назад +1

    this is THEE best speaker i have ever witnessed and THEE best ted talk i have ever watched. thank you so much mel for the well needed inspiration and push. i have been in a very depressed state recently and felt like nothing was going to come from my life and after watching this ted talk not only did it give me a good laugh, which i needed as well, it gave me a sense of purpose and passion to finally get the stuff ive always wanted to do done.

  • Hem Qadir
    Hem Qadir Месяц назад

    Happiness is the state of mind, but there are many things that affects it.

  • Anime Otaku
    Anime Otaku Месяц назад

    I am going learn how to do the piano

  • Ashish Kalantri
    Ashish Kalantri Месяц назад

    ........"Ohh my God, I don't remember driving here".....

  • Colin Ji
    Colin Ji Месяц назад

    I like the speech,,,,,, but I'm a young student and something that might be inappropriate constantly comes out.

  • Steve H
    Steve H Месяц назад

    I find her very loud, too obnoxiously american.

  • Five Cents Matter
    Five Cents Matter Месяц назад

    So why don’t I have what I want? I either really don’t want it or I’m being lazy. That’s fair. I needed this video, thank you!

  • rahaf sh
    rahaf sh Месяц назад