Meanwhile... Scientists Think Self-Driving Cars Will Get Sexy

  • Published on Nov 14, 2018
  • While Stephen's monologues take a bite out of the day's top stories, he uses his 'Meanwhile' segment to heat up the leftovers.
    Subscribe To "The Late Show" Channel HERE:
    For more content from "The Late Show with Stephen Colbert", click HERE:
    Watch full episodes of "The Late Show" HERE:
    Like "The Late Show" on Facebook HERE:
    Follow "The Late Show" on Twitter HERE:
    Follow "The Late Show" on Google+ HERE:
    Follow "The Late Show" on Instagram HERE:
    Follow "The Late Show" on Tumblr HERE:
    Watch The Late Show with Stephen Colbert weeknights at 11:35 PM ET/10:35 PM CT. Only on CBS.
    Get the CBS app for iPhone & iPad! Click HERE:
    Get new episodes of shows you love across devices the next day, stream live TV, and watch full seasons of CBS fan favorites anytime, anywhere with CBS All Access. Try it free!
    The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via CBS All Access, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.
  • EntertainmentEntertainment

Comments • 451

  • Grace
    Grace 3 months ago

    I have the sudden conviction that Stephen extra knows how to find the g-spot.

  • toyota_fun_supra
    toyota_fun_supra 6 months ago

    I won’t want a driverless car

  • Ykhraam
    Ykhraam 6 months ago

    isnt it just great that theyre creating self driving cars, while pets are still flown in cargo where they can die during flight and held in quarantines for 40 days =_= progress in some areas of transport, still middle ages in some others

  • Rachel 'RTNightmare'
    Rachel 'RTNightmare' 7 months ago

    Sex jokes are my kind of jokes. 😋 I’m still a teen at heart, guys.

  • mostmelon
    mostmelon 7 months ago

    Is 5'10" tall for a woman? I'm 5'10" and I've known plenty of women taller than me.

  • jammer3618
    jammer3618 7 months ago

    Too crude for me

  • SuperLeica1
    SuperLeica1 7 months ago

    There will be no self-driving cars, at all. Not without human programming beforehand, which automatically makes them NOT self-driving. The human input will just be delayed until You start Your journey. Let´s hope that the programmers did a perfect job! Not just good, it has to be perfect. Or folks will die.

  • Natilie E. S.
    Natilie E. S. 7 months ago

    So you're telling me that some people are upset that transgenders weren't apart of the Victoria's Secret show? ...REALLY???

  • Azure Balmung
    Azure Balmung 7 months ago

    "It's Fall, Which Means It's Time for Gonorrhea" sounds like a news announcement from TV in Futurama.

  • Pavel Dvorak
    Pavel Dvorak 7 months ago

    What is plus size supposed to mean? Don't encourage fat people

  • Michele Kett
    Michele Kett 7 months ago

    Thanks for the Victoria’s Secret segment, it’s such a crock!

  • Sonicplys 64
    Sonicplys 64 7 months ago

    But big women are my fantasy. VS doesn't cater to me.

  • Hoodoo Man
    Hoodoo Man 7 months ago

    We already have sex while driving. There is a certain thrill about getting knobbed while driving 100 miles an hour. Why in the hell would we want to ruin that with setting the vehicle on autodrive and retiring to the rear of the vehicle and having boring pedestrian sex? I can do that at home with my wife.. When I would much rather be doing it with your wife at 100 mph. Just saying.

  • Jason nec
    Jason nec 7 months ago

    Trevor Noah wants his bit back

  • Shigemi Notoge
    Shigemi Notoge 7 months ago

    As a plus sized trans person, I agree with with the Victoria Secret Spokesperson. It's some people's fantasy, sure, but not the one they're marketing. Tea is a perfectly fine, acceptable drink that many people love, but you wouldn't see people drinking tea in a commercial for coffee. If you complain about lack of representation for tea drinkers by a coffee company, you're just a fucking idiot. If you drink tea, you are cannot force a coffee company to sell and market tea just because you want it. You either buy what a company sells, or buy what you want from someone else who sells it.

  • Carl M
    Carl M 7 months ago

    It's about 2 inches in on the anterior wall

  • Christopher Saunders
    Christopher Saunders 7 months ago

    Shouldn't this be in the 'Cyborgasm' segment?

  • Adam Martin
    Adam Martin 7 months ago

    lol... .that's why they got those doctorates, to predict what things people will have sex in.

  • saultube44
    saultube44 7 months ago

    And the Truth will set you free...

  • satyakam shashwat
    satyakam shashwat 7 months ago

    meh... do the trump again

  • Miss Rumpus Parable
    Miss Rumpus Parable 7 months ago

    oh that was filthy. Yay Stephen.

  • Baylon Jackson
    Baylon Jackson 7 months ago

    I don’t get why people are mad about what the VS guy said. He’s a businessman making a business decision. Maybe one or two trans if the fit the mold of the current models but they shouldn’t have to go out of their way and include them or plus sized people. I don’t get why people are get mad when it comes to things like this. I’m not upset that no NBA or NFL or MLB team is coming after me I’m slim and only 6’1” I’m not built for it nor are the majority of people but they don’t make a stink out of it.

  • Elian Wils
    Elian Wils 7 months ago

    Mg that overly loud reoccurring outro tune on every late show clip is getting annoying

  • Ace Diamonds
    Ace Diamonds 7 months ago

    "according to science its fall, which means time for gonorrhea."

  • AH Hmm
    AH Hmm 7 months ago

    Can they please please please please get rid of the loud and horrible music at the end of these videos?

    SHAILESH TIWARI 7 months ago

    Finally a video without trump trumpet.

  • C.K. Brooke
    C.K. Brooke 7 months ago

    Shared and public self-driving vehicles will have cameras in them though.

  • Lesley Leith
    Lesley Leith 7 months ago

    Takes me back to my youth, a steering wheel does get in way, but, you know, you can climb into the back seat🙀🙀🙀😹😹😹😹😹😹😹💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

  • MrTingles
    MrTingles 7 months ago

    Gonorrhea? I hardly know 'er...!

  • ForeverMe543
    ForeverMe543 7 months ago

    “We market to who we sell to”
    So short and average height people shouldn’t buy there? How about disabled? No? Just feel like putting down plus sized women like all stuck up fashion stores, despite that being stupid monetarily and bad publicity?

  • ForeverMe543
    ForeverMe543 7 months ago

    That g spot joke was the shit

  • GILLIAN Muspic
    GILLIAN Muspic 7 months ago

    Last comment was interesting to me. As a pharmacist I noticed a long time ago that there is a spike in UTI infections in the spring and fall

  • Daniel Murphy
    Daniel Murphy 7 months ago

    Meanwhile, Stephen?
    What happened to Cyborgasm?

  • Priscilla Jimenez
    Priscilla Jimenez 7 months ago

    His expression us priceless lol 1:25

  • ioana ilea
    ioana ilea 7 months ago

    Watch how brainwashed into this neo marxism people are, they're trying to make every company, everyone be all inclusive. They guy from VS is right, it's just not the brand for those things. Why not go make one that specifically targets those people? Why do we have TO CHANGE EVERYTHING to accomodate minorities? Why? It's just like with movies, you don't need a remake of a male character with a female protagonist! You need more female protagonists in their own stories!

  • Iron Sword
    Iron Sword 7 months ago

    So they will allow to searh on the internet while driving or have anime voice as your gps?

  • 刘宇龙
    刘宇龙 7 months ago

    LOS SO,,,此世际为躲和捉周旧岁,知旧習慣捉入貞,无旧識習怎会坐久和知礼知敬意,??,己持而職何政宗之老闆不知,持而不知他人平民百姓生,老,病,亡,之所須之成己事业缐,,,而?。

  • SuperKing604
    SuperKing604 7 months ago +1

    Victoria secret is right not everything is for everyone and there selling unattainable fantasies, if that gives u body imagine issues then fix your brain and shake it off

  • jas16899
    jas16899 7 months ago

    You don't know someone's genitals based on the fact they are trans. So the whole idea that people here think that trans people are demanding special panties is just a dumb interpretation of the story. The point is, the guy said no trans models and that is not a statement about genitalia.

  • Ackalades 444
    Ackalades 444 7 months ago

    The Simpsons did it first😅

  • Michael Carrillo
    Michael Carrillo 7 months ago

    I've already saw this on that Netflix show

  • nickrich56
    nickrich56 7 months ago

    ... meanwhile in Japan a guy married a hologram ... not easy to give a politically correct punchline ...

  • James Humphrey
    James Humphrey 7 months ago

    colbert will around a lot longer than donald trump when he is lost and forgotten and hopefully his wacko family along him or all locked up and in mental institutions

  • Andersen Zheng
    Andersen Zheng 7 months ago

    Tesla already made them sexy. They have model S3XY. coincidence? i think not

  • Kevin
    Kevin 7 months ago

    LMAO@!!!!! These jokes were the best!!

  • Dickie Oi
    Dickie Oi 7 months ago

    Somewhere in the world there's a kid walking around named Gonorrhea because their idiot parents thought it was 'cool'.

  • zer0Bot
    zer0Bot 7 months ago

    Tinted windows will be a must, to make the outside dark.

  • Trumpty Dumpty your fall is coming!

    isn't it odd how a segment on herpes and gonorrhea is a welcome respite from Trump.

  • Ramon Perez
    Ramon Perez 7 months ago +1

    Very refreshing segment.

  • naota3k
    naota3k 7 months ago


  • Acorneyelid
    Acorneyelid 7 months ago +2

    Only problem with VS is they're catering advertisement to generic male fantasy while trying to sell to real life women.

  • nypctechman
    nypctechman 7 months ago

    Some of his jokes are just so terrible in this one. I think he's great but seriously its one thing to read something and laugh to yourself and yet another thing entirely to repeat it for actual comedic laughs. Hope it gets better...

  • Maria Dowler
    Maria Dowler 7 months ago +1

    Bahahahahahah classic

  • Jonezx2020
    Jonezx2020 7 months ago

    yeah dude i mean duh

  • firestream93
    firestream93 7 months ago

    Goddamn, I didn't think it was possible! He can actual comment on something else, instead of whining about Trump!

  • 6kchea !
    6kchea ! 7 months ago

    LMAO we love you Stephen!!!

  • Steve  Davis
    Steve Davis 7 months ago +1

    I made the attempt a few years ago in a mini-cooper but got a fine of 120 dollars . Reason= legs should be below the knee and not blow me as example, how ever she did a great job.

  • hawkeye5955
    hawkeye5955 7 months ago +2

    Nothing says "It's Fall" like getting gonorrhea in a self-driving car.

  • Ryan
    Ryan 7 months ago

    Is he feeling alright?? Not about Trump🙀🙀🙀 Sad pest that tries to fool the American people with Jazz-hands 🤗🤗🤗

  • Seditia Rose
    Seditia Rose 7 months ago +1

    Fall has suddenly lost some of its charm. 😳

  • grodhagen
    grodhagen 7 months ago

    Anyone who has ever seen Russian drivers videos will want Russia to get these self-driving cars first.

  • Emily Eldridge
    Emily Eldridge 7 months ago

    Absolutely brilliant and funny too and you got to love Stephen Colbert so much, Also a one great funny guy

  • Lucky Kitty
    Lucky Kitty 7 months ago

    Self driving cars will be used for disabled people.

  • DungeonStudio
    DungeonStudio 7 months ago +1

    Here today, gonorrhea tommorow.

  • Sceptical Pickle
    Sceptical Pickle 7 months ago

    I'm getting aroused just thinking out it

  • Isaac Liu
    Isaac Liu 7 months ago

    What happened to cyborgasm

  • Hans Hvaffornoget
    Hans Hvaffornoget 7 months ago

    pretty wack

  • Renato Corvaro
    Renato Corvaro 7 months ago


  • sdfkjgh
    sdfkjgh 7 months ago

    That Victoria's Secret guy obviously has no idea about Rule 34.1: Whatever it is, it's someone's fetish. NO EXEPTIONS!

  • Shin
    Shin 7 months ago +1

    "According to science: It's fall." ♥

  • spyfire242
    spyfire242 7 months ago +1

    There is nothing wrong with targeting a specific audience, go ahead VS.

  • James Giesea
    James Giesea 7 months ago

    So Victoria's Secret pulled an Abercrombie & Finch? Lets see how that goes?

  • Marley Bee
    Marley Bee 7 months ago +2

    If you don't want to drive your car, take the bus!

    • HaloInverse
      HaloInverse 6 months ago

      Having sex in a bus is usually frowned upon.

      ...well, except for certain buses, which are not exactly "public transit".

  • Chris Ford
    Chris Ford 7 months ago

    I can't believe these sheople booed at the Victoria'S Secret thing.

  • Michael Wilson
    Michael Wilson 7 months ago

    Wasn't this explored in the Kid 'N Play movie class act? Play gave a presentation where the teacher described his theory of "Sex and function of breeding environment". Weird. Life imitates art..?

  • Blue Steel
    Blue Steel 7 months ago

    Of course any vehicle will be used for sex. Pretty sure I have had sex in every car I have owned. I even had sex on my ATV.

  • Tracy Taylor
    Tracy Taylor 7 months ago

    Is that Pumpkin Spice

  • ursaltydog
    ursaltydog 7 months ago

    Love this segment!!

  • ursaltydog
    ursaltydog 7 months ago

    Of course autonomous cars will be used for sex... jacking off while feeling the vibrations of movement going down the road will "hold" new meaning..

  • Yonatan Shenhav
    Yonatan Shenhav 7 months ago +1

    not a SINGLE good joke. Stephen should hire new writers, cause i didnt even smile in 3 minutes.

  • Maelstrom Magnet
    Maelstrom Magnet 7 months ago

    2:21 *you're welcome*

    MARKSTRINGFELLOW1 7 months ago

    I get them first hot air balloons bobbed up and down a bit

    MARKSTRINGFELLOW1 7 months ago

    I get them first hot air balloons bobbed up and down a bit

  • Retromemories
    Retromemories 7 months ago +4

    Meanwhile, Trump is sitting at his desk wondering why Stephen isn't talking about him.

  • V Denton
    V Denton 7 months ago

    I wanted to tell you my very favorite psyche story of when I worked in the inpatient locked adult psych ward Corpus Christi Texas right off the beach now one day I came into work on the evening shift that was my shift it's the roughest they're all jonesing their sundowning they're wanting to get the hell out of there it's a wild time anyway the staff on the day shift said oh my God wait till you see our new patient we saved him from you for me to admit and do the paperwork so they were all laughing so I went and looked at the chart okay we got a guy named Fred hear the cops brought in off the beach he's a young guy looks like Fred was trying to drive his van off into the waves they're okay so okay well and he's in his room so I'll go on in there so I go in there's somebody in there in the bed and it's a person wrapped up in like a baby blanket and they've got a baby bottle they're holding and this person has those little Bamm-Bamm ponytails on top of their head like a little girls wear and I said well hello Fred I'm so and so and I'm here to do some paperwork with you to get you admitted in here he says my name is not Fred my name is Sabrina it turns out Sabrina was wearing a full little Catholic girl uniform complete with the little saddle shoes 2 and we did not know what in the hell to do with red beak I mean Sabrina because if she came out and went to lunch with all the guy patients she was going to get beat up we just kind of let Sabrina do her thing until the commitment hearing which happened and the judge let Sabrina go on back out to the beach and get in her van she came back from the commitment hearing dressed like a man and absolutely normal so that's how the judge let her go I don't know it was all so damn crazy I'll never forget Sabrina

  • Con Man
    Con Man 7 months ago

    Bless the researchers who created cars for sex. Now I won’t have to worry about police or kids in other cars.

  • Svart fra Sør
    Svart fra Sør 7 months ago +3

    Road head just got a whole lot better.

  • me and me
    me and me 7 months ago

    the scientists prediction is much interesting, as the object itself.

  • Alex Muir
    Alex Muir 7 months ago +1

    More of this and less about trump please! So tired of your trump voice.. I'm all trumped out...

    • Alex Muir
      Alex Muir 7 months ago

      @Charlie Vetsworth I tend to think everyone was tuned in for the election and the midterms. Trump just had the best messaging for the swing voters, related to trade, America first and controlling the border when he got elected. Come to think of it, it was Trump on the TV all the time and still is. All I'm saying is a reduction in Trump comedy would be refreshing for a while. Love Colbert though.. long time fan!

    • Charlie Vetsworth
      Charlie Vetsworth 7 months ago

      Too bad. Trying to ignore or avoid what is happening is exactly how he got elected in the first place. Evil needs to be under constant vigilance.

  • Montesama314
    Montesama314 7 months ago

    Hey, if the Victoria's Secret guy doesn't want to market to trans or plus-size folks, let someone else do it. (Though, I have no idea what trans lingerie is supposed to look like...)

  • Steve Jarvis
    Steve Jarvis 7 months ago

    So what would happen if one day, people became so dependent on self driving cars and all of a sudden out of the blue, they malfunctioned?

  • Lazy I Ranch
    Lazy I Ranch 7 months ago +7

    I can understand not catering to trans-gendered, as the whole point is that these men enjoy wearing women's clothes. They are missing out on a HUGE market (pun intended), as most American women don't wear size 6. I know lots of beautiful, curvaceous women who are sexy AF. Fredrick's of Hollywood appreciates their business, along with Cacique.

    • J1428753
      J1428753 6 months ago +2

      Honestly it _is_ pretty dumb. Unless you're either a bigot or lazy, excluding a demographic that would be easy money (most non skinny/white/etc women wouldn't know where else to shop) makes no sense and makes you a poor businessperson above all else. Forget morality telling you you're wrong, fucking _capitalism_ is not even on your side. How often does that even _happen?_
      And its not like it'd be a hard problem. Both could be fixed by making slightly modified lines of lingerie that are a bit-ahem, _roomier_, and then, regardless of if she thicc or trans, bae would be that much hotter while she's hard at work suffocating you until you faint. Win-win! :DDD

    • K C
      K C 6 months ago +2

      @Valerie Rodger Most women don't fantasize about being black either but that doesn't mean they shouldn't include black models. Plus size women (which is technically I think anyone over like a 5/6? Like, we're not talking morbidly obese here just like... average size?) can fantasize about being gorgeous plus size lingerie models too.

    • Valerie Rodger
      Valerie Rodger 6 months ago

      Victoria's Secret has plenty of clothing that fit plus size women, that's just not part of their marketing campaign. As he said, they are marketing a fantasy, women don't fantasize about being overweight.

    • K C
      K C 7 months ago

      @ioana ilea It's not wrong. What's wrong is saying that trans women aren't part of that image even if they ARE skinny, fit, tall, and young. Their explanation makes it sound like it's not actually about image, and is actually about being transphobic.
      I don't think they NEED to have trans models, but their reason for not having or wanting any is an issue. (As for plus sized models whatever, that's not their image, I get it.)

    • ioana ilea
      ioana ilea 7 months ago

      Not every company needs to cater to everyone. VS has an identity of it's own, has the angels that represent their beauty ideal. Skinny, fit, tall young women with very feminine features. Maybe they dont want to lose the specificity of that identity. That's not wrong! And the news makes it seem that way, which speaks volumes about the news trust's agenda. Not every single thing has to be about everyone. There are other companies that market to those people.

  • Chris Lee
    Chris Lee 7 months ago

    Just place a bed in the back seat

    LAOMUSIC ARTS 7 months ago +1

    Proletarisch tasteless!

  • Tea Eye
    Tea Eye 7 months ago


  • Dan Martin
    Dan Martin 7 months ago

    Finally something funny and not anti trump

  • Morgil
    Morgil 7 months ago

    I'm in love with my car

  • Tyler Staley
    Tyler Staley 7 months ago +1

    Imagine the possibilities with tricked out self-driving car interiors. Bring back the 70s van beds!

  • Wayne Black
    Wayne Black 7 months ago +4

    Meanwhile, no one is talking about the caravan anymore.
    How odd.

  • Madwizard145
    Madwizard145 7 months ago

    Anyone else hate thus guy?